Littlebigman at the movies

Family Guy

2012-02-11T19:01:00.002Z

I'm busy doing a storyboard test for Family Guy and I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to get it. Which is kind of a shame. I've been out of the drawing game for so long that I'm struggling to do basic stuff.

So I haven't been able to do much in the way of writing, but next week I'll be back in the swing of things. I have a deadline for the end of the month for a pitch and I have to get it done.

I've been asked to pitch some ideas to a company and it's a brilliant opportunity to push along the project, which is very much in the idea stage into existence.

Slowly, painfully slowly I've been chipping away at my list, I'd like to think I'm getting somewhere, it's hard to tell as everything is so damn stop start.

The only piece of writing I've managed was helping Christian with a pitch for one of his shows. It's a fantastic idea but still needs a ton of work.

I've spent quite a bit of time writing pitches this last year and I'm not sure they're getting any better at all.

They should do right? Merely the act of writing should improve ones work. It's lost on me, the harder I try the worse my writing seems to get.

Maybe it's that my perception of good writing is beginning to outstrip my ability. That wouldn't be a good thing if my ability stays at the mediocre floor.

But being mediocre and delusional never stopped anyone did it. So on I shall go.

Blessed Isolation

2012-02-02T06:53:00.003Z

I've been working alone, as most writers do for a while now. Locked in my own writing bubble and haven't really haven't done much in the way of looking at other writers work. It's been so long since I read another persons script and it made me realise that probably I'm making a lot of mistakes.

I don' t feel like my scripts are fun to read. The reason for this is because I spend so long on working out the story. My description is so minimal that it barely registers. I feel like I have to raise the bar a lot higher if I'm going to achieve anything as a writer.

I need to go back and do some homework.

A lack of inspiration...

2012-01-30T04:31:00.002Z

I've been working on a new treatment for a series idea I've had for a while and I'm struggling to inject anything worth reading into it. I'm not sure why. It feels like all of my ideas are flat and boring at the moment. I believe it's a great idea and would make a fun and interesting show, but I can't seem to lift myself out of crappy stodgy writing.

My jokes are flat and I'm writing waffle. Maybe it's a good thing, perhaps I'm improving and in trying to raise the bar I'm beginning to see how bad my work.

Seriously I doubt it. Writing is hard at the best of times, the more I do the harder it becomes. I know there's a really funny engaging show in there somewhere. I just can't find it right now.

I do know one thing for sure, blogging isn't going to fix the problem.

A calls to arms of sorts..

2012-01-29T04:14:00.003Z

In September of 2010 I directed a music video for Elton John, which of itself sounds pretty impressive. The video didn't turn out too well, which was a shame but considering the budget I had was next to nothing it really wasn't that unexpected.

And therein lies the problem. One the day of the shoot, my budget as £400 pounds, four hundred quid to make film an Elton John video. Obviously the budget was more than that, but after I'd deducted the cost of CG models, compositors and rest of the production that's what I had to shoot with. It was a valiant but doomed effort and one I've decided I never want to repeat again.

I remember at one particular moment lying on the floor of the studio I was filming in and cursing as I couldn't get enough light onto the subject because the only studio I could afford was so small I couldn't light the thing properly. There was no DP and I'd borrowed a low end camera. It was a bit shambolic.

On the plus side, I learned a huge amount of really invaluable stuff I still haven't had the chance to make use of.

I've come to realise over the last year and a bit that I've been banging my head against the wall and I did myself no favours trying to achieve great results with little or money. WHile I was in the UK we were the cheap guys and we just couldn't get out of that.

I've felt like a complete failure and probably considering the restrictions I didn't do all that bad.

My only gripe is that I haven't directed anything since, not because the video was so bad I might add but because this year has been so disrupted.

I've decided to make a fresh start and even though I don't have the means I'm going to start again.

Everything I've done before is going to be filed away as "practice". Whatever I do next is going to have to be a hundred and fifty percent better than anything and everything I've done since I began my company. It's all going in the bin. I'm going to throw the gauntlet down to myself and pull my directorial socks up. If I can't do it the right way then it's not worth doing. OK? Ok.

Playing the waiting game.

2012-01-17T02:22:00.003Z

On my 24th birthday I moved to Vancouver to work for Dreamworks, I realised today for the first time that my travelling adventure ended five years to the day on my 29th Birthday when I left Germany for the last time to return to the UK. For some reason I always felt I was away much longer. A lot had changed in five years, I wasn't a vegetarian any more, it was impossible after living in Germany where vegetarianism meant simply someone who actually cooked their meat, such is the teutonic love of animal flesh.

The last few months of my travels were spent in a small town in east Germany called Halle a town so dull that when the Berlin wall came down 60, 000 people left, leaving the town practically deserted. I was working for a company called Motionworks on my last film as an animator Laura's Star. During that time I came to the conclusion I'd had enough.

I came back to the UK and was lost, I was suffering from what I now understand to be an early mid life crisis. I'd spent the last 7 years of my life working ridiculously hard to become a great animator only to find myself in an a semi abandoned German town.

So I went home somewhat with my tail between my legs and after stumbling around aimlessly for a while I set up Mckeown-Devita with Christian. That chapter has now firmly come to an end.

For better or worse, I'm getting a chance to press the "reset" button. For the life of I can't say where this means I'm headed, time will tell.

Coffee ruined my life....

2012-01-03T21:40:00.003Z

Disaster struck this morning! That's right after a sleep deprived night a large cup of coffee found itself liberally covering my laptop.
My son took it upon himself to not sleep at all, leaving me in a zombified state this morning, my limbs and brain weren't functioning, it could only ever end in fried electricals.
This is not a good turn of events, the timing could not have been worse. I've spent the holidays writing and I'd just finished a new Fridge treatment, a new show pitch and brand new portfolio.
Right now there isn't much I can do but curse the heavens and mutter to myself. I am however as usual undeterred.
Knock me down and I'll get back up and cry a bit, but I'm not going to be stopped by some Brazilian coffee.

A quick note

2011-12-29T21:01:00.003Z

Before I leave I'm going to write a little writerly post, just to say that I haven't done much of anything because it's been christmas, that and the fact that I spent several days working on some budgets for a project I'm beginning to doubt will ever happen.

I am going to get back to it though, I don't have much time left at all, so I'm under the gun. Maybe the gap will help me to solve the issues I had with Fridge, maybe not. If not, it's really ok because I have to finish another pitch for January.

Life on pause.

2011-12-29T20:22:00.003Z

ok, we're moving again. The fourth time this year, that's a lot of moving and disruption. Hopefully it's going to be the last one for a while, because I'm very tired of it and at my venerable old age of 37 I don't want to keep packing up my meagre possessions every five minutes.

These last few months have felt like I'm in stasis, actually I'd go as far to say the last year has been like that and it's time for a change.

The hardest part is that I'm waiting for change and there isn't a lot I can do to be the instigator of it. I just have to sit and twiddle my thumbs.

I've spent the day updating my IMDB page, which I haven't done for a long time. Frustratingly the last seven years of my life may as well not have happened as none of the work I've been doing counts as "noteworthy".

The year is almost over and this and my failure to have IMDB recognise my existence and my lack of any forward movement has made me a tad grumpy.

I would love to turn over a new leaf only I don't think there are any more leaves to turn over.

As the year is closing generally people make new years resolutions, I'm not going to. I have to play a waiting game.

I have a plan of sorts, which I'm not going to divulge. I'm hoping that our decision to stay in the US is going to be the right one.

I'm crossing my fingers.

Lost in space

2011-12-08T23:48:00.003Z

For one reason or another I'm not getting anywhere this week. I'm disappointed with myself and I need to snap out of the malaise I'm in.
I've been noodling Fridge Of Time all week and although it's progressed, it's not really moved on all that much.
There's something missing and I think it's plot. I don't know why I've suddenly hit the wall with it. In fact it doesn't actually feel like I've got started. I have a feeling that I need to to from scratch and try and forget everything I've written so far, which is an incredibly hard thing to do.
The problem I'm having is that what I've written so far isn't going anywhere.
I can vaguely remember working on the original idea and thinking a similar thing and then barreling through it without really solving the issue.
Funny characters and situations. alone do not make a half hour tv pilot.
I read somewhere that, funny dialogue was fine, but actually writing funny stories is something else entirely and required a greater skill level than just blowing jokes into the world.
I'm oftentimes my own worst enemy as I rarely write treatments, which seriously has to change. I'm not saying I don't ever do it, but for the most part I start with a funny idea and work outwards.
With Fridge, it all feels a bit flat and uneventful and I can't seem to find that thing will tie it altogether into something satisfactory.
I really thought it would be a breeze, wrong again. Staring at the wall or writing this blog doesn't seem to be working either.
I need to focus....ok, FOCUS.

Defrosting the Fridge.

2011-12-06T00:20:00.003Z

I'm back on the Fridge of Time after almost a year. It's oddly both familiar and alien all at the same time.

So much has happened over the last year that I've disconnected from it somewhat. I'm finding it hard to get back into, but conversely the characters and the show is something I'm really comfortable with.

Right now there probably isn't a more perfect opportunity to finish it, but it's already after a couple of days in really hard going, I'm distracted for some reason.

I'm essentially taking what was originally to be episode 2 and making it into a new pilot.

When I wrote the original radio play my tiny editor was nagging at me constantly that I may have been going down a blind alley with the story I chose. I persevered with it because I didn't feel like I'd cracked the world and knew the characters well enough. I was being stubborn with it.

By the time I'd finished, I was sure I'd cracked it. I was on a roll, almost immediately I began writing the second episode right on the heels of the pilot.

Then for one reason or another I had to stop and the project just sat there occasionally waving at me apologetically to remind me it was still there.

I promised myself I would finish the pilot even if it never happens I want to get a great TV pilot written, it may never be, although I intend to record the radioplay when I can.

I have a strong desire to finish what I started. I'm still really proud of the pilot, I worked so hard on it, night after night. It was probably the most fun I've ever had writing.

Now I have to pick up the project after a year. I managed a mere 21 pages of the new script before I hit the wall.

At the time I thought it was some really funny stuff in there and for the most part I think it still stands up, but it seems to be lacking any kind of story right now.

Pretty much the way the first script was when I picked it up. This time round I don't have any distractions, but I do have limited time.

I'd better figure it out because it's already tuesday tomorrow and in two days I've managed one page, yep that's right one page of writing......very poor form indeed.

I need to pull my finger out.......

Finding the funny

2011-11-23T01:42:00.002Z

Well it's been an unproductive day, that said I did get my teeth cleaned at the dentists, the drive alone meant that it was pretty much the only thing I managed to achieve on my daily goal list such is the vastness of the US.

Alright, I don't actually have a daily goal list, I don't know anyone that does and if I did I would most definitely hate them.

I managed a tiny speck of writing and the half formed idea of what may become a joke at some point in the future. Which is why I'm writing this blog entry.

I'm not funny, that is I don't feel in the slightest bit amusing at the moment. This is not a good state of affairs for a writer of comedy.

I've been working on my script for over a week and I haven't come up with a single titter inducing line or idea and I'm starting to worry.

I was heartened slightly today by coming up with two terrible jokes while I was at dinner, at least I know my brain is still working, but if things don't improve soon I may have to take drastic action. I may have to leave the house and do something.

Getting into the funny zone seems really elusive at the moment. I know I can do it. I've been there before. I'm writing more than I've been able to in longer than I can remember but somehow I'm lacking the extra twenty percent I need. It's a phase right? Tell me it's just a phase...

A draft of sorts.

2011-11-21T20:42:00.002Z

I have a draft. Finally! I'll admit it, it's not a very good one, but it's a draft nonetheless. I feel like I've hit the wall with it again, but the timing is ok. Now I'm going to get onto Fridge of Time and get that wrapped, even though I feel that deep down I don't have a chance in hell of getting it on the air. I've come to realise that the UK is a closed market. That's not going to stop me though. I have to finish it for my own sake. I love the project and it's very close to my heart.

I also need a tiny bit of breathing space to be able to look objectively at the draft I've been working on. I still feel like there's some room for improvement. I just don't know exactly how to deal with it It will come though, it always does.

Now for Fridge.

and yet another crossroads.

2011-11-18T20:20:00.002Z

I'm still on my script and I'm reaching another juncture with it. The project continues to evolve and I'm reaching a point where I can make some major changes. It's always tough writing by myself. Not having anyone to bounce idea off makes things tricky.

I constantly feel like it takes me three times longer to come to the right decisions. I've pretty much written a whole new show but there are some elements which have been in place pretty much since I first began the episode.

I'm not sure whether to lose them make even more changes and completely overhaul the whole thing.

There are still some issues that need resolving. I feel like I'm hitting the wall with it again. Thump, thump, thump.

It doesn't help that I've been sitting on the couch for the entire week. I need some fresh air.

Stop changing things....

2011-11-18T13:40:00.004Z

Yesterday I thought I'd change my blog layout, it's been a while and I was bored. Well that was a mistake. It's been improved. Now my gmail is linked to blogger, which is linked to my facebook page, which is no doubt linked to my bank account and every other fucking scrap of information I leave on the internet. Now I can't sign in on my blogpage I have to go through my gmail account.

I don't like. I don't want my accounts linked. I want to be able to visit one thing separately and not have my life all in one place connected. Who thought that would be a good idea? I don't want everything I've ever done in one place, life's not meant to be life that. It's not jut about privacy either. I like that I can go to my blog without having to go though a host of ad sponsored pages. It creates some variety in an otherwise currently very dull existence.

I really feel like just leaving the internet, it's just become another distraction and a big fat waste of time. The ads have moved in and the little sites have been swallowed up by the giants and now they want to link everything so they can no doubt sell us more stuff.

Sadly it's just evolution, albeit a digital evolution and all I'm complaining about is Darwinism in fast forward. Google and Facebook and their ilk have become the undisputed alpha males on a what is in evolutionary terms a small eco system. They've wiped out all the indigenous lifeforms and now they're building roads, joining the dots and strangling everything anything else that gets in the way.

How about we create a thing called the "outanet" where nobody actually goes online and we do things like call people or go out to dinner. Rather than constantly having ads spewed into our brains. How about that huh or is that too radical.

Thanks for listening and please remember to click on the sponsored ads.

What I did on my holidays

2011-11-18T00:18:00.004Z

This is a spoof magazine cover I made for my Zeus sketch featuring the very talented Boris Hiestend. As it's pretty much the last thing I did and there is nothing at all on the horizon I thought I'd post it out so I can have a good old wallow. I had loads of fun with this sketch. Unfortunately right after I made it, the rug was unceremoniously pulled from under me and I've not been able to make anything since.

On reflection it could have been funnier but then it was the most fun I've had making a film. It was supposed to signify my return to film making and would herald my return as a sketch director. Alas the economy crashed and burned and sent my little company into a tailspin. A downward spiral from which I still don't seem to have recovered from nearly a year on.

It's all very well and good picking yourself up and dusting yourself off after a tumble, but when some bugger has driven off with your car, mobile phone, wallet and underpants. The only thing to do is stick your thumb out and wait for someone to take pity on you and give you a lift. I'm still waiting.....Maybe I should show a bit of leg?

Coming up smelling of roses.

2011-11-15T20:41:00.002Z

I've had a busy week and a half, I had to fly to LA for some meetings and on the plane up from Florida I decided to try and tackle my rewrite. Surprisingly it went really well. It had been on the edge of my brain for while and I'd been trying to work out how to fix it. I think that I've finally found a solution I'm happy with. I scribbled pages of notes on the plane and realised I worked out the entire episode in a couple of hours.

Its very different from the project I started all those years ago, but I'm excited. I've made some big radical changes to it which I hope are going to be for the better.

I've pulled the main focus onto the lead and it seems to be working so much better now. I've had the luxury of time in the day to work on it and I'm quite close to a first draft.

I'm giving myself a deadline because I want to finish this, Fridge of Time and the Mind of Melville before Jan. I'm probably biting off more than I can chew here. No harm in trying eh?

A three forked road.

2011-11-07T19:09:00.003Z

I have begun what may be an arduous rewrite of my projects. I can't decide which direction to go in. There are so many avenues open and it's making my life really tricky.

There is something about the original pilot that I'm not really comfortable with. I have a feeling it's a small thing and I'm completely missing it.

After a meeting with a production company in the UK. I decided to take the story back a step to its original shape.

I'm in the middle of this right now, however I feel like I'm writing blind. I know that I can make the version I'm working on work. I'm just not sure if it's the version I want to write.

Originally the show was pretty much a straight "family" sitcom, I felt that there were so many similar things on TV.

The meeting went along the lines of what we need is a british "Simpsons" and the producer proceeded to tell me that I should try and make the show more like the original version I had.

The thing is that 8 years ago I would have agreed, but TV has moved on a long way since them.

The Simpson's has been running now for over twenty years and there's absolutely nothing that they haven't covered in terms of a family. On top of that there's family guy. I have to ask myself does the world need another family sitcom. I have to say that my answer is no.

So now I'm trying to find a middle path and I don't think it's working. Ok, it can work, I can make it work, but do I want to do it. Will I be pushing the boundaries and creating something original. The answer is no.

There is a third way, but it's a do over. The more I think about it, the more I feel this might be the right way as it would really focus on the main character and right now that's the issue. He's missing a personality. I really just don't know which direction to take, maybe I should try all three.

Back to basics...

2011-11-07T01:19:00.002Z

Ok, I'm back. For how long I don't know. I'm writing again, that is, I have a couple of months to get through my backlog of projects and so I'm starting here. I know that I shouldn't be blogging, but I need to some inspirational lube and so I'm treating this as a warm up. I haven't set myself any goals just yet, all I know is that tomorrow I'm going to start again on a rewrite of my animated project. I began a partial rewrite a few months ago, then got then busy. I haven't had any opportunity to look at it. The thing is that I'm not even sure the new direction is the right one. In fact I'll go as far as the say I'm confident that it's a step backwards, but I have to do it.

Today while I was walking to the supermarket I think I nailed the reason why I'm so uncertain about the projects direction and it's because the main protagonist doesn't know what he wants. This has been pointed out to me by a couple of people including my agent. I agree only I believe that is actually right for the character. So now I'm left with a big problem. How to write about a person that doesn't have any idea what he wants. I don't think it's possible.

So it may be that I have to go back and start again from the beginning and this blog entry is going to set the wheels in motion.

The show is a sitcom but actually has quite a bit of social commentary in it, which I find really interesting. I'm just missing something really important. Nice idea poor execution. I keep thinking that if I nail it. It will have a bit more substance than the usual knob gags I write. I start in earnest tomorrow.

A quick note

2011-09-28T22:04:00.003Z

It's been a while since I last posted, life has been getting in the way again. At the moment I feel like I'm in a plane circling an airport waiting to land and there is nothing to be done but wait.

There are a couple of important deals being negotiated and until it's resolved I have to sit tight and eat the complimentary snacks provided.

I can't stand feeling like I'm waiting for my life to start. I was hoping to be able to tackle some of my scripts, but it's not likely to happen at the moment as my head is elsewhere.

The only recent bit of news of note is that last week I spent a day at Tiger Aspect in a writers room brain storming on a new animated series. It was the first time I'd been in that situation outside the confines of my own company and I really enjoyed it.

I actually felt like I contributed, whether or not anything I came up with goes into the final show is another matter, but I'd like to do more of it. It was nice to be in a room with people who have been working as writers for years and to have the issues I had with the show we were working on confirmed by other people.

In fact I wish I'd have tried a little earlier to get into writing as I've come to realise just how much fun I have with it.

I'm going to have to find more time to write or I'm never going to get anything finished....there, I've said it.

Harplufff...

2011-08-02T18:56:00.003Z

Today I finally heard back on a deal I have on the table with a major company. It's taken 8 months to get an offer and I assume it will take another eight months for it to be resolved. It infuriates me, seriously. At this rate I'll be retired by the time it happens.

I'm truly surprised that anything gets done in this industry. I'm still working on my script. I'm beginning to feel that it's in fairly decent shape and there are some good jokes in it.

I'm at that point with it where if I'm going to rewrite it again it will be a major overhaul rather than some minor tweaks.

I'll need some distance for that though. I've been so immersed in it I'm sure at this stage I couldn't see it even if I wanted to.

Better get back to it.

Done and dusted....maybe.

2011-08-02T07:12:00.003Z

I slept on the couch last night, I was exhausted for no good reason. I'm reaching the end of my rewrite and as usual it's taken me longer than I'd hoped. I'm still not sure about this project. The subject matter for all it's fantasy is grounded in every day relationships and general misery. It's certainly a challenge for me.

I was struck yesterday how my personality imposes itself on my editing. I was clinging to a scene that I thought I should change, but I wasn't sure the replacement I had in mind was necessarily better. I don't think there is any room in writing for temerity, you need to make bold decisions.

If you don't you end up with tepid waffle. My unwillingness to make big cuts can't be a good thing.

I"m finding this script hard, I know I'm still very much finding my comedy voice and perhaps this is a little outside my comfort zone.

But any decent writer worth his salt should be able to come up with convincing characters whatever the scenario.

I'm heading towards the finish line, although I have a feeling I maybe revisiting this one again soon.

Stitching it all together

2011-07-30T22:56:00.002Z

I spent the day writing again. I think that I might be almost there with the rewrite. It feels like I'm in the final stretch. I'm finding this script pretty challenging. I'm outside my comfort zone with it and I'm writing characters that I usually steer clear of.

I'm a little concerned that I'm resorting to cheap humour, I hope it's not the case. The thing is I just don't feel funny at the moment. I know it can happen I just wish it wasn't happening now.

I'm giving myself until the end of the day to finish it. It better be good.

Rwrites...

2011-07-29T23:31:00.003Z

I'm pleased to report that I'm firmly back in the writing saddle. I'm rewriting one of my pilots it's been sitting it's been almost years since I looked at it. For some reason I hit a brick wall with it and I haven't been able to make any headway on it.

I've been asked to finish it, which has given me a reason to tackle it. I'm struggling with it but for different reasons than the ones that usually plague my writing.

Its the first time I've tried to write an ensemble series with very distinct characters that share the world and all have their own voices distinct voices. Although I've only been back on it for a couple of days I'm finding it hard.

Probably it suffers from a lack of any real planning. The project is actually an old one I began years ago.

Originally it was based on a family and was unashamedly a Simpson's style show, it was pretty poor.

I always felt though there was an idea there somewhere, I had some time a couple of years ago so I completely overhauled it.

Then for some reason it got stuck and I just couldn't seem to see which direction to take it. This will be the first serious rewrite.

Something still isn't connecting and I'm not sure what the problem is. It might not have been helped by the fact that I don't feel particularly funny at the moment. I hope it's just a phase because I need to finish it.

I need to sleep on it.

Change

2011-07-20T22:56:00.003Z

I thought I'd check in mainly because I seem to have a spare 20 minutes, which is rare these days, It's not really long enough to do anything substantial so I thought a bit of blogging couldn't hurt.

I'm sending some of my comedy writing off to a production company tomorrow and for some reason I feel there's seems to be some level of expectation around it.

It made me question how good my work actually is, something that is incredibly hard to judge.

In the grand scheme of things I haven't really been writing that long. It has always been something I've done on the side. Over the years my head has coughed up so many ideas that it's impossible to do them all. It's only recently that I've had the urge to do it for a living and it took me a long time to actually get a decent amount of work together. In lots of ways I feel like I'm very much at the beginning of understanding what writing is all about.

When I was an animator I became obsessed with the idea of being "great". I didn't really make it, but I did achieve the goal I set myself.

I worked incredibly hard and thanks to an obsessive personality and an ability to turn the volume down on the rest of my life I managed to carve out a pretty successful if unremarkable career.

I feel like I was driven less by the passion for what I was doing and more for the winning the approval of my fellow artists.

I'm not motivated by the same goal with comedy writing. I simply like doing it.

Making comedy feels like I've come back full circle but how good I am at it is incredibly hard to quantify. I've had a lot of really encouraging feedback from my work recently. Occasionally though the little voice of doubt whispers in my ear and reminds me that there a people who have been slaving away at writing as religiously as I once did with drawing.

Just like my animation career I have some goals that I want to achieve and so far I've been incredibly lucky that for the most part I've managed to do the things I've wanted.

We'll see what happens tomorrow shall we.

Things that make you go "hmmm'

2011-07-13T23:20:00.003Z

I've just watched "In The Running" again, the reason all those years ago I started this blog.

Back then I was a lot more idealistic, the last six years have been an education in lots of different ways.

I'm actually surprised at how bad it is. It was in filmic terms a bit of a disaster. I remember it kind of hanging together, but time hasn't been kind to it I had to turn it off before I was half way through. Still for all the difficulties I had I was proud of it at the time.

You'd expect some improvement over the last 6 years. I can't actually believe it's been that long since I made it, so much for my plan to become a world renowned comedy film director.

Thankfully I have the same passion for film making as I had when I began, the only drawback is that with a new baby I can't afford to go out and make films for fun right now, at least not yet.

I'd like to think that somewhere along the line I'll get the chance to make another short. I've learned cast amounts about films and it would be an absolute waste not to get to do something with it.

Looking back over my work over the last few years, it's a bit of a mixed bag really. If feels as if in some ways I never really got started. Certainly as far as comedy goes I tended to keep getting pulled away from work that paid. It was really only last year that I began to feel like I was producing work I could happily show people.

There have been quite a few disappointments this year and rather than the progress I was hoping had materialised. In fact felt like I've been sliding backwards at times. Life has been firmly getting in the way and all I can to do is sit and wait it out until the path is clear again.

I want to get back to making films soon. I wrote "Balls Deep Undercover" for that reason. Now it's languishing on my hard drive with all my other ideas.

I need the clouds to lift soon, I've done all the waiting around I'm prepared to take.

I've lost my thread....

2011-05-30T21:33:00.003Z

I am currently multitasking, I'm holding my three week old Son in my left hand while I type with my right. I'm on the baby graveyard shift, it's my turn to feed the little blighter.

I have my hands full and it's not only babies, I have a lot of work on and unless I duplicate myself, I'm not sure I'm going to get it all done. Luckily I noticed that on the ads on my blog someone is offering blog writing services. Outsourcing my blogging sounds like a wonderful idea and apparently fantastic results are guaranteed. I'd be a fool not to try, I am curious to know what exactly these results are, football results maybe?

I've had to take a break as I've successfully spilt two ounces of milk over my child. He's hungry and wet, I'm a terrible Father. Being able to aim milk into his mouth with a baby bottle shouldn't be a complicated task. Alas I've managed to do it.

So on top of the feeding I had to change him. Trying to put clothes on a newborn is like trying to dress a squid and is a skill I haven't mastered yet.

Now I promised myself that I wasn't going to talk about my child so I'm going to stop and instead talk about dialogue, which is a subject I feel very strongly about.

I notice an awful lot of clunky dialogue films and television. Last week while I was eating my lunch I overheard a television show that my partner was watching. I was in the other room and could only hear what was going on. It was awful, wooden, contrived and it made me cringe.

I like dialogue, I think out of every aspect I enjoy writing it the most. I don't profess to be any good at it, but I am very precious about and I work very hard to make it sound as natural as I can.

I once wrote a pilot script for a company and had my dialogue changed by someone whose second language was English, the result was that the dialogue was understandably awful. Unfortunately that person was the director, so there wasn't a hell of a lot I could do about it.

He couldn't see it or more importantly hear it and the result was I was embarrassed to have my name attached to it.

It has recently happened again and I'm finding it hard to not get annoyed. I appreciate that in writing you're a gun for hire and that really I have no say in the final version. But when I see my very hard come by dialogue being swapped out for the sort of lines I despise I can't help but get upset.

I'm not sure what the solution to this is I think I have to just suck it up.

uff.

2011-05-25T21:35:00.003Z

I feel like my recently my blog has slipped off topic. There are of course reasons for this, life has had a habit of shoving itself in the way of my film making exploits.

Every now and then I get a little pang of frustration that I can't continue to make my comedy shorts.

The arrival of my son and the need to pay the bills that have been piling up has meant it has had to take a bit of a back seat recently.

I certainly don't intend to stop. I'm content to be writing and for the moment, I'm happy to do just that for a little while.

But I want to get back in the saddle again and sooner rather than later. This blog is or was a film making blog.

I still have my music video to produce. It seems to have temporarily died on it's arse. It's seems my only option is going to be patience.

Back to the drawing board...

2011-05-23T20:22:00.004Z

It's back to boarding until I hear back on my script revisions. The thing I dislike most about storyboard is having to work on other peoples terrible scripts. It's quite a common thing in animation. I always feel that an awful lot of failed live action writers end up for animation.

I may be wrong, but over the years I've worked on some really awful poorly thought, out lazy stuff.

I'm not suggesting I can do any better, but it is galling to have to work on episodes that have so little thought put into them.

Still it is a lesson in how other people approach visual storytelling and that can't be a bad thing.

The sooner I'm done the sooner I can get back to writing again......

Brain Freeze

2011-05-22T22:10:00.003Z

I'm having a little writing break. I've been slaving away all day on a script. I'm nearly there, but my brain feels like it's reached saturation point and on top of that I have two hours more of being a dad before my partner takes over for the night shift.

I feel like I've cracked the script today. It was very much a case of pulling out a piece and the rest just falling into place, which was really pleasing. The show I'm working on is despite it's simplicity actually quite challenging to write. There are so many restrictions it makes it hard to maneuver in a decent story.

I finally got to work with the show's script supervisor which helped massively to get things back on track.

I want to see the back of it as I have to return to my storyboard. But also I want to get back to my own work. I still have the Fridge Of Time to finish, it's driving me mad that I can't even thing about it at the moment. I've been tempted to reread it, but I know that all it will do is frustrated me because I can't spend any real time on it.

for the moment I'm just going to have to take things one word at a time. At the moment that word "engaged".

Checking in

2011-05-18T19:42:00.003Z

I'm back briefly after a crazy few weeks and I couldn't return without mentioning the news of the birth of my son Callan Mckeown. I'm not going to get all soppy and emotional, I'm too exhausted for that. His birth is worth a mention though as generally births only happen once in your life, unless you're a born again christian and I'm not quite sure the two things are really that similar.

So what's been happening then? Well, did I mention my son was born? That has meant that the rest of my life is really all a blur.

Toastie was accepted into Cartoon Forum which I think is a significant step towards getting it off the ground. So I'll be heading to Poland in September to see if I can find a broadcaster.

I haven't been able to do any actual writing. Although I have finally picked up on a script I left off in January.

I've pretty much had to stop everything, I'm sure it will all return to normality soon and I'll be back in the thick of it.

Blueghhh

2011-04-25T21:50:00.003Z

The brochure is just about done. It has taken me almost a week and I've spent hours with my head in budgets and spreadsheets.

I find the financial side of Producing boring as hell. I still for the life of me can't worked up about the average rate of global acquisition rights and financing research schedules. I'm guessing there is someone out there who gets positively giddy at the thought of an excel spreadsheet. Good Luck to them. I'll be glad to see the back of it.

Between burying my head in buckets of ice to stay awake and working on projected cashflows I had a think, probably a little too late, of who might play the lead in my C4 pitch if the actor I have approached says no.

I have to be prepared for it. I think I've found someone, the thing is that they seem to be very well thank you very much don't need me or C4 to boost their career.

The look of the characters are so specific that I have to discount about 90 percent of comedy peformers. It's going to be tricky.

The person I'm after better say yes then eh?

Nothing to declare.

2011-04-23T21:36:00.003Z

A little while ago I added Adsense to my blog, apparently so the adverts go, you can make money advertising on your blog.

I must admit I'm still not sure how this is supposed to work. I suspect that somehow money is directed into your account when people click on an advert by an ad fairy.

How the money gets there without me giving away my bank details is a mystery, but it must work because that's what the adverts says.

Adverts are apparently specifically tailored to content of your blog. so I was a little puzzled today to find an advert for "decorative manicure." I don't think that's the technical term for it, but then it's not a service I'm very knowledgable about.

Maybe Adsense knows something I don't, certainly it doesn't know my bank details. I think I've been hoodwinked.

None of it matters as nobody reads my blog anyway and these days I'm far too busy and have better things to do. Which brings me to my brochure, which is almost finished.

It's taking far longer than it should have done, but if I do say so myself looks pretty fantastic. I'm hoping that it will do the job it was intended for. I'll be pleased to see the back of it so I can get back to my writing.

I haven't been able to look at the "Fridge Of time" for weeks as I've had to divert all my attention elsewhere. As annoying as it is it might give me the distance to be objective and finish it. Before that though there's my C4 pitch to finish, a storyboard and oh yeah a child to have.

Brochure boredom

2011-04-21T21:17:00.004Z

I'm taking a brochure break. I'm working on a huge pitch, did I mention it was huge? Well, it's huge.
It's taking me away from other important stuff, but if it works out this time next year, we'll all be millionaires. By we I don't mean you, I just have to clear that up, I don't even know who you are. I'm sure you're lovely but if I am earning millions then I can't just be giving cash away to anybody can I?
OK, I'm exaggerating a tiny bit, but if the project comes off it will be worth the huge amount of work and effort I and a lot of other people have put in.
Back in the Live action world I've heard back from an agent and another member of my dream cast has agreed to put their name to the project. This is very exciting and to celebrate I bought myself a Mars bar. Oh the frivolity.
The last person I think may be a more difficult nut to crack, I can't qualify this I just have a feeling.
Regardless, it's actually pretty cool that two out of the three names I wanted have agreed. As the song goes though, 3 is the magic number!

Tired.

2011-04-18T22:17:00.003Z

Another long day and I wish my brain was working sufficiently well to start writing now. I'm frazzled, I've been working since stupid Oclock this morning.

I'm going to have to push myself quite hard this month if I'm going to get everything I need to do done. I've finally made a start on the second pitch of the month. This one is massive and if I blow it I'll have to wait for another year. I need to make to count. The annoying thing is that my C4 pitch still isn't finished, almost, but not quite.

I did manage a tiny bit of writing over my morning coffee, it's not enough. Too many things are demanding my attention. Must try harder

Zzzz

2011-04-16T22:26:00.004Z

I am tired. It's been a long old day, luckily a productive one, so I can give myself a little pat on the back.

I finally sat down with a friend and fleshed out a show we came up together with a few months back.

We've been meaning to make a start for a while, it's very different from anything I've come up with before. For a start it's not really a comedy. The great news is that for some reason people are keen to see it without me having given too much away. I must be doing something right.

I also received some very insightful and useful feedback from my agent on my latest pitch. So now I'm going to go back do a bit of rewriting and make some improvements before I submit.

I try to steer away from certain types of humour and I wasn't sure if I'd gone too far. At least some of it seems to be funny.

I'm feeling positive about it. This is a good thing.

A brief interlude

2011-04-14T17:22:00.002Z

So far the response to my pitch has been really positive ,except for my partner who doesn't like it at all.

Generally she likes my jokes and I've been in relationships before where my girlfriend hasn't found me in the least bit amusing. Not that I want to reinforce any stereotypes here but she was German. Needless to say that relationship didn't last long.

On this occasion just because she doesn't find every single gag I produce hilarious doesn't mean it's not funny or that I need to leave her.

I had a chat with a writing buddy who shares a similar sense of humour and beforehand I knew i'd be able to pinpoint exactly which bits he and his writing partner would like. Sure enough he said they were his favourite bits.

Jokes are so subjective, I often find it really odd that two people can share a similar sense of humour and yet can differ so much on other styles of humour.

This idea is definitely more vulgar than a lot of my work. I try to rein myself in as much as I can because I don't want to rely on cheap gags and the usual comedy crutch bad language. Sometimes you just have to go for it.

Next up is my animated show, which has recently taken on a life of it's own and I've been struggling to keep up with it.

By the end of the month is should be heading into the "funding" stage. Amazing. So I'm going to have to sign off for a bit.....

When life gives you lemons, have a good moan....

2011-04-13T19:29:00.003Z

Well, I finished my pitch today and sent it off to see if I can get talent involved. It's out of my hands now.

I'm pleased with it for the most part. It's hard to condense a half hour series into sketch form.

I've done my best and I think the scripts are funny. They're stupid and perhaps a bit vulgar, but funny.

Next it's on to some boarding, which I just feel is a unwelcome distraction. I'm doing my best to see the positives in it. It's just that the more writing I do, the more I want to do. I love it, there's nothing more frustrating and rewarding than creating stupid characters and coming up with dumb jokes.

Things are definitely moving in the right direction. I know it's just a matter of time until I'm doing exactly what I want to be doing. So all I need have patience. I just don't have any.

Blah Blah

2011-04-12T06:17:00.002Z

I have an incredibly busy month but somehow so far I've managed some writing everyday. It's about to stop as I have to move onto some storyboarding.

I've more or less started from scratch with my scripts for the pitch at the end of the month and the deadline for that and a very important submission for my series is fast approaching.

I have to get a 30 page brochure together for a series I'm working on.

I've had to put Fridge to the side for a little while, which is frustrating but there's nothing to be done for it.

By tomorrow I'll have my pitch finished and ready to go. Then it's just persuading the talent to get on board.

I'm already feeling like I've spent too long on this project. It's hard starting from scratch, but hopefully the extra effort has been worth it. Time will tell.

A day of Productivity.

2011-04-04T17:58:00.003Z

Today felt productive. I finished a pitch for a music video and started making some props for my new comedy film. On top of that I revisited a script for my C4 pitch and a little bit of distance gave me the space to improve it. Still, a long way to go on it, but it feels better.

I feel like I need to cram as many jokes into it as possible, but the length is tricky as it's too long for a viral, but too short to really get to grips with the characters.

At least I think it's improving. This month is going to be insane with the amount of work I have to do.

I have two big deadlines looming. I've had to put Fridge on hold, but that too is probably a good thing. Having a little break helped last time.

My next short seems to becoming a reality. Tomorrow another prop will arrive by post and I'll be sticking, spray painting and generally making a mess. Brilliant.

Tiny voices

2011-04-01T22:40:00.003Z

I finished a draft of a script for a pitch today and had been feeling quite smug that I'd actually achieved something. That was until someone read it and told me it was rubbish.

Strangely a couple of the comments I had known were picked up by the tiny editor in my head. A couple of jokes felt wrong. The problem is I don't have a better alternative yet.

What I do know is that trying to get the idea into small pill sized chunks is proving a lot more tasking than I'd anticipated.

On a positive note the agent I've spoken to seems to think the actor I want to play the lead might be open to the idea. This would be brilliant.

The problem now is writing 3 fantastically funny, concise scripts in just a few days. The show is really a half hour sitcom and every time I sit and write it begins to expand and the ideas flood out. Which if I had the luxury of time would be great, but time isn't a commodity I have in abundance at the moment.

Tomorrow I'm going to have a really day I need to get somewhere with it, I'm going to sleep on it.

What I did on my holidays part zwei.

2011-03-31T18:31:00.002Z

Writing is hard and don't let anyone tell you different. Ok it's not physically hard. But it is mentally taxing. I find it particularly difficult writing alone. I know for a fact I'm a much better writer when I have someone to bounce ideas off. Still you can't have everything can you. I'm grateful that at least for the moment while I'm waiting for a job to start I'm writing more or less full time. My first pitch is getting there and I should be writing now actually.

Last night I watched 3 parts of the Boosh documentary and afterwards I got a bit despondent. Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt are really funny. I was laughing out loud, granted I had drunk a half bottle of wine but they're such fun to watch I couldn't help myself. I began to feel that all of my work was dull and pointless and well not funny.

One thing I really love about their work is they don't seem inhibited at all and for me this gives them so much energy. So much comedy these days is clinical and tight and takes itself so seriously.

Julian recounted a joke apologising to the crowd about seeing other audiences he used to do in his early stand up act and I chuckled because I came up with the line "I'll only see other coffee shops" when asked if I want a loyalty card. Julian thought it was a crap joke, he's probably right.

I'd love to be able to find the wanton comedy abandon in my work. For all my years writing jokes I still think I'm developing. It was a bit sobering to realise I've still got a long way to go.

I think the problem with comedy is you can never really tell if you're heading in the right direction.

What I did on my holidays

2011-03-30T19:15:00.002Z

I've taken a little break from Fridge as I'm trying to get a couple of pitches in shape for a broadcaster. I've been working away for the last couple of days on two projects that I've had lying around for a while.

Both of them, I think would work as series. I'm having a huge amount of fun working on one in particular and I've contacted the agent of a guy I would love to be one of the leads.

I really don't know if there's any chance of it happening. It's one of those instances where the person in question is perfect for it, in fact all of the people I had in mind for it are.

Luckily my good friend Bob knows the other people I'm after and hopefully they'll be interested.

So we'll see. The tricky part is that I really need to fit the premise, which is really a series, into short episodes always easier said than done.

If it doesn't happen now the great thing is that I will have done a huge amount of work to get the show into a coherent shape. It has life beyond some throwaway shorts.

It's an old idea and I would love to see it happen. It's very different from everything else I've come up with and would be so much fun to do.

I'd better get back to it.

The eighteen page hump.

2011-03-20T22:09:00.002Z

I'm at that place again. I seem to find myself in the exact same position with almost every script I write. Eighteen pages in and I hit the wall. It happened with the original episode of Fridge and stuck like fast like a cartwheel in a bog.

The same thing happened with Harry and getting over it sent the script in a completely different direction than I intended. It worked out in the end but and it's getting much easier.

Here I am again with Fridge part deux. All of my ideas have come together and the threads are flapping loose waited for me to pick them up and tie them into something resembling a story.

I've resisted the urge to print out my script, which is generally a sign that I'm stuck and need to "see" what I'm writing.

I've been much looser than usual with my preparation and just written down whatever comes into my head rather than agonising over whether things work for now.

I have to get over the hump soon as I am fast running out of time. I don't feel like the real work has begun on it. I've been sketching some ideas and loosely working out a narrative which I'm still not very sure of.

I struggled for what seemed like forever with the original episode. I have the benefit of having worked out what needs to go into each episode so it does give me something to hang the story on. I just need to find a way to tie it all together in a satisfying and entertaining way.

By the light.....

2011-03-19T23:49:00.002Z

I've just got back from walking the dog along the sea front. It's a full moon and the tide is in, the light of the moon was reflecting on the waves like dancing quicksilver. For a fleeting moment I felt part of something grand, beautiful and timeless.

The effect was as beautiful as it was inspiring and only slightly ruined by the sight of a drunken, fat middle aged woman staggering out of a bar on the seafront to the sound of dance music blaring out into the night.

Still I am inspired by Bexhill, for all it's mix of winsome Victorian charm and army of ex pat cockneys.

I'm getting into the routine of writing and it's fantastic. I don't have any commute so I can get up cross the road to the cafe and write in my notebook. For the first time since I lived in Hackney and began Fridge I've found a spot to write. I plop myself down and write. No distractions.

Despite having an unproductive day I've written another sketch and made more progress with Fridge. How long it will last though is anybody's guess. Much as I loathe it, I have to take some storyboard work. So it will be back to listening to standup radio and scribbling notes during meals.

But for now, I'm taking the opportunity with both hands.

The Friday night blog.

2011-03-18T20:22:00.002Z

Today I put the finishing touches on my website. It's taken way longer than I'd anticipated but it will be done soon and that can only be a good thing. All it needs is putting together, it's only four months late.

While I've been waiting for renders I've started writing a sketch which appeared as a footnote in an animated script I wrote about five years ago.

I haven't been able to work on Fridge as there has been painting and more DIY to do.

I thought I would tackle something a little more achievable so at least I feel as though I'm getting somewhere.

I've decided to pitch some ideas to C4's comedy blaps. I was given a tip off by my agent and now OHC is in the process of putting it all together.

Luckily I have an over abundance of material so it should be easy to get something together. The really tricky part will be convincing C4 to use us as I have a sneaky suspicion that it's already sewn up.

The end in site.

2011-03-16T16:44:00.003Z

My website is almost done. Huzzah. It does mean that I did nothing today in the way of writing. I did however find a very interesting website called Kickstarter.com. It's an american site designed to help fund creative projects, be they film, theatre music or the development of novelty balloon animals.

It's a similar idea to one my good friend Emily Ng has been trying to get off the ground here in the UK. She's been getting nowhere as the FSA won't allow it. This doesn't surprise me in the least.

Simply put you advertise your project on the site, offer small rewards and the idea is that people will donate or not. If you fail to make the required amount you don't get a penny and the money goes back to the people who donated.

It's a great idea and one that I'm going to try out. I have a mountain of material that probably won't ever see the light of day unless I can find the budget to make it.

The great thing is that I really don't need very much to make stuff. So most of my projects are small and I would think appealing for that reason. There's no harm in giving it a try.

I've learned the hard way over the last six years what low budget filmmaking entails and I'm pretty sure I know how to make it work.

My biggest frustration is that I can't independently fund my own projects. I'd chuck at tenner at me. All of this talk of funding projects brings me to my latest sketch, which actually looks like it's going to happen and will be funded by someone who isn't me for the first time.

Things are coming together. I'm meeting the producer on Friday our DP is in place, so far so good.

I can't think about me appearing in it too much, I'll go mental. It's been so long since I've done any acting and I know that if I don't give it my all I'm going to be wasting a lot of peoples time, including my own.

National Fridge day

2011-03-15T16:04:00.002Z

I'm back, I've managed a day of Fridge and it's like I never left. I know it's going to take a while to get it into shape, but I've made a huge amount of progress already. The only slight nagging problem is that I don't really have any jeopardy in there at the moment.

Maybe this isn't going to be a problem. It seems to me at the moment the story I have although kind of funny is lacking in places and one of the main characters is sort of just flapping his gums without making any real contribution to the story. This is a problem and I need to come up with a solution. It can't be the Lance show.

I feel like the character set ups are pretty solid and the dynamic and relationships are fun, but there's something missing.

Der Kuhlshcrank auf Zeit

2011-03-14T22:59:00.002Z

A friend of mine has just got back from Vienna, a city I was fortunate enough to visit over a decade ago. At the time I was struck by how law abiding the viennese were. I distinctly remember crossing an empty street as a gaggle of viennese pedestrians waited patiently for the lights to change. The road was completely devoid of traffic, it was early on a Sunday morning and there wasn't a car in sight. I also remember watching a shoplifter being paraded through a store by a burly security guard. Old ladies booed and hissed as he passed them on his way to a waiting Police car. This kind of thing doesn't happen in London, people just stare. The thought of showing any kind of emotion in public, even disgust, is just not the done thing.

By coincidence it's also the setting for episode two of Fridge.

Finally, I'm going to sit down and tackle it. I haven't touched it for a what seems like forever. almost as soon as the ink had dried on the pilot I began working on the second episode.

I was on a roll at the time. I researched the time period and read a few biographies and then as usual got busy.

I'm allowing myself some writing time, I've been storyboarding and I have a gap. I'm assuming it won't be a long one as I still have to finish rendering for the website. But tomorrow is very definitely "Fridge day".

While I'm waiting

2011-03-09T10:21:00.003Z

My website stumbles towards completion and while things render and my day is broken up into tiny pockets of computer induced dullness.

I'm waiting to hear from the BBC again on another sketch I sent in to BBC online. I'm starting to feel like part of the family if the amount of correspondence I get from them is anything to go by.

I sent a few sketches and as usual got some really positive feedback, but it seems like there's so many people that have to see it and approve it, even down to the cleaning lady. That getting one on air can seem like to trying to scale an SAS obstacle course.

I've had so many near misses and it's hard not to get frustrated. Actually it's kind of comical.

On the positive side every sketch I write is in my opinion one less I have to write to become a decent writer.

This time I'm a tiny bit closer as I've been asked to work up an idea and it seems like it may have been give the nod. I've been here before mind you. I was asked to produce something for them. So I'm very aware how fickle and capricious it can be.

I'm not naive enough to expect this means anything, but progress any progress is a good thing. If i'm totally honest, I'm not all that bothered about getting anything on there. It's just I hate being told no I keep sending things in out of sheer bloody mindedness.

So I shall keep plugging away until either I or they cave in I know where my money would go.

The increasingly poor decisions of Paul Mckeown

2011-03-08T18:50:00.004Z

This year I made some decisions which at the time seemed perfectly reasonable and ostensibly were steps forward. I've since learned that the old phrase "look before you leap" has persisted as words of wisdom for a reason.

I keep telling myself I could never have known but as I'm now in a very precarious predicament I have to ask myself I should have done some things a bit differently. At least I can laugh about it. I can't stop laughing actually, it's been three hours now. Should I be worried?

It's not all gloom and impending financial meltdown, there are some very exciting things on the horizon.

One of them is my sketch which I've begun planning. The track is for the most part recorded and now all that's needed is a kick ass video, which is easier said than done.

Luckily I've found a producer who is into the project and so the wheels are moving again. I'm having to this the long way around and cost everything before I can find the budget.

I have very kindly being promised a small amount of money to make it. As easter is coming up it's a perfect time to do it. Funny or Die have said they will feature it, which is great. It's a pity they won't pay for it, but that's the way of the world these days.

So I've begun a little bit of research and it all of the things I need can only be bought in America. This may be because of the evangelical fervour over there or it may have something to do with rampant consumerism. It's more than likely both, it does however pose a problem.

There may still be time to order the stuff and get it sent over in time for the big day, I won't ask for help from the Lord above, if he does exist. I'm in for a good old fashioned kicking.

As usual I can't do the things I want, it's the same story I have to edit myself before I start and make something work on next to nothing.

Production value costs, although there is no harm in asking and audacity never hurt anyone(I can't qualify that).

I'm not complaining I would rather do it for peanuts than not at all. I want this sketch to be a reality and for to be better than "The Goss", which was the closest I've achieved to the things I set out to do. Even if I do have some serious issues with it now.

This one has to go that extra mile. if I'm going to hell I may as well do it in style.

Mind of Melville

2011-03-06T21:58:00.002Z

I'm writing finally. It's really more of a short break between DIY. I spent he entire weekend painting and lugging planks of wood around, now finally I'm back on my new project.

I'm pretty exhausted if I'm honest and I'm finding it hard to get my ideas to spark but I seem to be getting a bit of momentum going.

I've only managed a few snatches of conversation but it's something. It's going to be really tricky because there are so many other very pressing things going on.

This project is ambitious and boiling it down into something tangible is a little daunting, hence the blog procrastination.

I could do with a nap.

More render talk.

2011-03-02T20:46:00.002Z

I'm back after a break of, oh hours. I've been at it since 6.30 this morning and I've had too much coffee.

For all of my grumbling I feel like I'm getting things done. Finally after more trouble than it was worth I've managed to dig out a lost promo and put onto my new reel.

It's strange looking at it now. At the time I was really proud of it, I directed, edited and graded myself and now looking back none of those things are good enough.

I remember being really nervous on the day and was kicking myself that I wasn't more assertive.

It could have been so much better, a decent grade would help massively. I'm actually wondering if going back to it might help in the long run.

I'm also been putting the finishing touches to a deal that will see another of my shows come together. I'll find out if the deal goes ahead next week, if it does it's yet another big step in the right direction. Things do actually seem to be moving, just too slowly. I was beginning to feel that the wheels had fallen off the bus.

I've even managed to do more brain research for my radio series if I keep this up I might actually get things done.

A brief render blog.

2011-03-02T14:14:00.003Z

Alright so I'm blogging again. But only because I'm putting together a showreel and the machine is taking ages to render. So this is a between render entry and is just about all the writing I'm able to do at the moment.

This week I've been pitching on a commercial and generally doing other things. Monday I had a meeting with Disney in the UK about a show I've been developing. So still chipping away, chip, chip, chip.

One top of that I'm working on getting a new website which is proving immensely difficult for no good reason.

Last night I made a slightly flaccid attempt at doing some research for my new radio show. It's hard to get anything done at the moment. As usual a million things are going on. I'm resigning myself to just being someone that has to do twenty things at once to actually do anything.

At least I'm working on it. As usual I coughed up a load of ideas and now I have to go in and weave them together into something tangible.

I'm really excited about this project, probably more so than with Fridge. If I can get it right it could be really fresh and original and importantly bursting will nonsense.

Unlike Harry or even Fridge I have to work it all out before I finish the first episode, because the overarching story needs to fit together perfectly. So there's lots of work to be done.

If I can work it out and pull it together I think I'll have really achieved something personally. It's an ambitious project even though the idea is very ostensibly very simple. Because I'm so busy I'm just going to have to allocate little bits of time to it as and when I can. The only frustration is that I'm fired up about it but can't do very much about it right now.

Render has finished it. Back to work.

A sneaky pos before the big move.

2011-02-18T23:17:00.004Z

The house is full of boxes of my stuff. Tomorrow we head for Bexhill and as I'm sitting in the only space left in the house and all of my possessions are packed away I thought I would babble on here before I go to bed.

I have nothing in particular to say except that I'm looking forward to unpacking everything setting up my new desk, overlooking the sea if anyone is interested and writing my heart out.

It's not going to be the full time endless hours of writing I was looking forward to for one reason or another. But I'm determined to get through my list of projects and this summer I'm going to actually write the feature film I've been scribbling notes on between projects.

For now though I'm submitting my script into the BBC on Monday and I will see if anyone is interested. I hope so, I believe I'm on to something.

I'm not going to rest on my laurels, Bexhill offers me a fresh mental start, before London drives me mental.

Right off to bed.

The first and last.

2011-02-15T16:30:00.002Z

This is my last post for a while. I've been ordered off the blogging. A good thing too. I'm writing to say that I have finally finished a proper first draft of Harry. Huzzah.

Now it's back onto Fridge Of Time and Mind Of Melville. I'm looking forward to getting back onto Fridge, it's been too long.

See you around.

Funny or Die

2011-02-10T23:57:00.004Z

Well my pitch got rejected and I was expecting as much. I'm not that upset, more frustrated. Because I know for a fact there's no way the BBC will be interested in producing it. So as usual it's down to me to fund my own films. That would be fine if I happened to be a multi billionaire that was literally shitting money.

As I'm not I'm going to have to find another way, that I'm hoping doesn't involve sexual favours, at least not on my part.

I still think Funny Or Die is doing a great job and I wish we had an equivalent. But there just doesn't seem to be the will or the money in the UK. Comedy box failed because the stars were reluctant to get involved because no one was watching and so it had nothing to offer the bovine masses, because there were no stars. Catch 22. No one was brave enough to champion it.

Will Ferrel started Funny or Die and paved the way for well known faces to partake in a safe environment and know they could poke fun at themselves. It didn't happen in the UK, even funny or Die UK folded. We're too afraid, suspicious and negative.

Everyone is terrified of getting it wrong and so very little actually happens. Our stars move to America not to make it, but to be appreciated and probably to actually do something.

I think the entire British comedy fraternity should up sticks and move to America, the weather is better for a start.

I'm going to make this happen even though everything in my life seems to be pushing in the opposite direction.

So there......

An apology

2011-02-09T22:43:00.004Z

This is an apology to anyway that has typed my name into the Internet recently in the vain hope that they may glean something about me from my Internet presence.

Obviously if you're a psychologist then you'll have figured out that I'm a neurotic, obsessive compulsive dreamer with a flimsy grip on reality and an over developed sense of drive and ambition.

If you're someone trying to discover anything about me professionally reading my blog won't help. You should turn away now, no really. I'm not joking, you're completely wasting your life and you'll never get this time back. God doesn't do refunds.

I know that people have been visiting the blog because it says so in my stats. Whoever you are

I can only shrug apologetically. I don't know what you were expecting, I'm sure it wasn't this.

My presence on the Internet is very scant indeed. I haven't really been getting myself out there and I know that having an Internet presence has become really important. In fact these days if you don't then you may as well not exist. I am a nobody because the Internet says so or doesn't say so.

I didn't start this blog so I could be tracked down my people checking out exactly what I've done and who I am.

I started this blog for purely selfish reasons that has nothing whatsoever to do with advertising myself to the world.

I'm sure if I'd have thought about it I would have tried another way. I've have certainly made myself sound a lot better than I do on here. If I'd have been thinking at all then I wouldn't have named it eponymously. That shows the level of intelligence we're dealing with there doesn't it.

Keeping up this blog is less of a hobby and more of a nightly distraction, it's better than masturbating. It has become my diary and not a very interesting one.

So I'm sorry whoever you are. If I'd have known you were coming I would have tidied up...

Pitching

2011-02-09T14:22:00.004Z

I sent my song to Funny or Die and I'm waiting to hear back. I'm sure I know already what the answer is. The frustration for me is that I can't afford to go out and make a new sketch with a baby on the way.

There aren't that many avenues to send comedy, the choice is you make something or peanuts and it looks shit. Don't ever let anyone tell you that the quality of the production doesn't matter, it very much does. Or you keep writing stuff and hope that you get a shot, in my experience it rarely materialises.

It's annoying that I have to go through official channels. I would love to be in the position where I could just make whatever I wanted and distribute them myself.

It's very difficult sending stuff to producers because in a way you lessen it's impact, I really believe it's much better to burst onto the scene with beautifully crafted comedy gold.

I'm not all that hopeful, but it's not a reason not to try. I heard a podcast today and a comedy writer came out with the sentence comedy is written to make people laugh, there's not a lot of point doing it if no one ever hears it.

She's totally right. It's just that getting it out there is a job in itself.

Progress

2011-02-08T23:13:00.006Z

I feel like I'm finally getting to grips with "Harry". This isn't a euphemism for self gratification.

I'm actually making progress with my script. I'm into the habit of writing and slowly and steadily I'm moving forwards

I admit I clung onto a lot of material like a small child does to its mother for quite some time. In the end it had to go some of it was funny stuff too.

I've thrown out so much that the first draft is almost unrecognisable from my first idea. Whether or not I've got the makings of a great script is debatable and I'm sure won't be up to me to decide. But the very fact that I've not allowed myself to get too attached is a sign I've let go of it.

I feel like I have the structure more or less in place now. There are holes, gaps and some very obvious things need to go in, but it's more or less there.

I'm going to keep on, it will be great to finish it. I had a great sense of accomplishment when I finished Fridge, I'm sure it will be the same with Harry. The strange thing is that I'm not as emotionally attached to Harry as I was with Fridge.

I'm really not sure why. I hope that this latest script is going to be head and shoulders the rest of my work.

It seems to be more an intellectual challenge rather than the emotional one I had with "Fridge of Time", even though the humour is dumb.

I've given myself a deadline and I have to stick to it. End of the week or bust it is then...

Bad day at the office.

2011-02-07T21:55:00.002Z

Monday and boy what a Monday. Today the gods dropped a liberal dollop of poo on my head.

It's been interesting, not in any particularly enlightening way. But it does go to show how small minded and short sighted human people can be.

I perhaps naively like to see the best in people, it's disappointing when people act contrary to your expectations.

I managed very little in the way of actual work today what with one thing or another and I promise myself that I'm going to finish my script for my film by the end of the week and get it to my agent even if I'm up all night.

A new sketch 2.0

2011-02-06T23:29:00.003Z

Yesterday I took a bit step in finishing my latest project. I redeemed myself as the last time I tried to record the lyrics for the song I'm working on. It was so out I felt like me and the song were in different time zones. Last time we had some technical issues. I was starting to dount my own musical ability and to my relief it wasn't my fault. I nailed the lyrics pretty much first time.

The song is really taking shape now and I'm more determined than ever to make the accompanying video for it. I'm still not sure how. I have a feeling it will be hard to convince people to part with money to make as it will be deemed offensive to certain people.

I think that the song is going to be great in itself and I'm still pretty chuffed with it.

I wouldn't mind doing a few more songs in this style and seeing where it leads. I've already got two more on the go.

I'm going to make the effort to finish them before I move to Bexhill, otherwise it's going to take forever.

I have a really strong urge to make the song and get it out there. Again though I don't want to do it if I have to compromise. There's no point making something if it's going to look shit.

With live imposing itself on me it's going to be really difficult to do. Where there's a will there's

a way.

I feel like I'm in a race against time and the clock is ticking.

Onwards and sideways.

2011-02-04T23:56:00.003Z

I'm progressing with my script. Huzzah. I spent a few hours in a cafe in Stoke Newington and ironed out a few problems it had. It's slow and steady.

I can't help but think it would be a better movie than a stand alone half hour, which is what it is at the moment. I'm really having to work the script to get it into shape and I've thrown out a huge amount of really funny stuff.

I'm always loathe to cut good jokes, but I know deep down that the secret to a great script is going to be in a few killer lines here and there.

More and more I'm cutting what I really think is the funniest material and I'm replacing it with what I hope is a really good plot. I'm sure I'll have to go in at the end and weave more jokes into it to replace the ones I've cut.

This project is evolving constantly as I write. It now has a plot definitely a good thing, before I just has a string of unconnected sketches. The upsetting part is probably I'm going to replace about 90 percent of it.

At least I'm making progress, the end isn't quite in site yet, but I'm beginning to see a shape.

Shape is good.

Harry...

2011-02-03T00:02:00.004Z

Today I reached what I hope is a turning point in the development of my sitcom script. Finally I've left go of the material and like a small child learning to cycle I kicked the stabilisers and cycled off furiously into the unknown.

I viciously and deliberately cut whole minutes from the script. I was like Sweeney Todd the demon script editor, snipping and cutting with a wanton abandon.

I know I shouldn't be getting excited about losing a whole 2 minutes of script, but it was getting to the stage where I was unable to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I'd even begun to doubt the script was working.

I think that every script, at least every script I write has a sticking point and for some reason I become completely incapable of getting through it. I generally get around this by moving onto other projects and then forgetting about it.

Coming back to something after a gap seems to work as I get a bit of distance. Not so with Harry, but finally it seems I've come out the other end.

Learning

2011-01-31T23:49:00.002Z

Writing in isolation can be a very lonely and fruitless task sometimes. I'm trying to finish off the script I started what seemed like months ago. It has been months actually. I could have done three scripts by now, but it wasn't to be. There have been so many delays and interruptions along the way it's been a struggle

I'm now hopefully going over the last bits and should be rights be finished this week. I've noticed that I have a style. It's only really just occurred to me. As a writer there are some things I'm not all that good at. OK, that sounds arrogant. I think what I'm trying to say is that I'm doing more and beginning to see what my shortcomings are.

I don't think I'm much of an action writer, I tend to struggle seeing action in my head. I think it's because I'm a comedy guy and most comedy tends not to be action orientated.

Nothing particularly wrong with that unless you happen to be writing action and adventure, which sadly I am.

Still, that's not to say I can't do it. Also the only way to improve is to tackle it head on and grab the bull by the horn(which if you've ever tried to do you'd realise is a really stupid thing to do).

I like plot and dialogue, I love to progress a story with words, not explosions.

I need to improve

Extras

2011-01-30T23:36:00.004Z

I've finally got through the extras DVD's. Admittedly I do have one episode left, but I'm pretty sure I have a handle on the series.

There's no doubt that extras is good, or bits of it are. There are moments that seem to fall a bit flat. I like Ricky Gervais, even though he's now got to the point in his career where he's regularly shot down. I think he's one of the best things to happen to British comedy for a generation.

My gripe is that like most british comedy it's downbeat and that really is a common theme with so many of the show's we produce. There's something small and miserable about us as a nation and it reflects in our comedy.We seem to rejoice in misery.

I've been watching an awful lot of American shows recently and I think that I prefer them.

Extras tells the tale of wannabe actor Andy Millman, he's been unable to break into the big time and skirts around the edges of film sets as an extra. He's a sad character, there's something very defeated about him even before he starts his journey. We feel pity for him, he's a sad clown, even as Andy finds success the world seems to be against him.

As the story arc progresses he gets a sitcom off the ground and yet he's unable to prevent the BBC gay brigade from destroying his creation.

As his fame grows, he becomes more and more discontented. He's perceived as making the lowest common denominator entertainment and accused of being a sell out. So even as his success grows we feel that he's still somehow losing.

He seems to be surrounded by people making his life a misery, his hapless agent, the BBC producers, his stupid best friend who constantly puts him in awkward situations. The humour derives mostly from Andy reacting to other people. Somehow he's not the master of his own destiny, he's a victim.

So we feel sorry for him which I think makes the show feel downbeat.

If you compare this to Curb your enthusiasm, Larry David is completely comfortable in his own shoes. Both shows share the same social awkwardness but It's Larry's abrasive unreasonable attitude that creates the comedy. He is more often than not the instigator of many of the situations.

I find Extras easier to watch than Curb, which I like but can only take in small doses. More and more I'm drawn to American show's, they seem so unashamedly slick and glossy. If I could only come up with something that transcends both sides of the atlantic I'd be laughing.

The cost of things

2011-01-28T00:17:00.003Z

I've been asked to pitch on a music video for a fairly well known artist and the budget is actually decent, it's not amazing but it's decent.

So I had an idea based loosely on the brief and have started to make some enquiries about how much and how feasible it would be to do.

It seems that no matter how much money you have it's never enough. It's so frustrating to be limited before you've even started.

I can see it happening again and I'm beginning to wonder if it's worth it. Except that if I got this job, it would be exactly the sort of style of video I've been wanting to do for ages. A funny, quirky vid.

But the question is how much crap do you have to take until you are allowed to have enough money to do the job. I'm not talking about lavishing cash all over. I'm simple talking about being able to pay for what a job or service is worth without having to apologise and say well

I can't afford anywhere near as much as it costs can you do a deal?

I think most people would argue, well that's the way it is and you can't change it. I really think someone should.

A new sketch

2011-01-26T00:35:00.002Z

Before I go to sleep I want to say for no particular reason that I wrote a sketch today. It's been a while, I'm not sure if it's any good, but still it's good to have done it.

The only way to get better is to practice and keep the comedy muscle flexed. I'm probably going to send it off to the BBC and see what happens. I already know the answer but if you don't try you never know and if you never know you die with regrets and I have too many of those already.

A tiny catch up.

2011-01-23T23:58:00.004Z

The last few days have been a bit of a blur and it has nothing to do with drugs or alcohol, I've just been busy house hunting. I have succeeded in finding a place, and it's Bexhill or bust. Woohoo.

I hope it won't come to that, I'd rather it be Bexhill and a nice comfortable relatively stress free summer.

Today I spent the entire day writing emails and finding names of people I need to be in contact with this year.

I've done bugger all in the way of real writing but relationships are vitally important in this industry.

I do need to make some headway with my projects, life is getting in the way at the moment. I can only hope that I will be spurred on by the fear of living so far from London that the locals have a slightly french accent. It will be impossible to commute so I'd better be kept busy writing.

I'm excited to be moving I think there's a bit of the gypsy about me. In the past when I moved I got a lot of energy now would be an excellent time to become more productive.

On that note, I'm off to bed.

Waxing Layrical

2011-01-20T23:29:00.002Z

There really aren't enough hours in the day. Today I was rushing around first a morning of meetings, then I made a pitstop in Camden to sort out some financial business and finally this evening I finished off the lyrics for my new latest and greatest comedy project.

I sucked today. It may have been the coffee. I was jacked up on Caffeine this morning and thus spent the day with my brain travelling faster than my body can cope with.

I was so bad that I'm going to have to record it all again. This song is really taking forever, hopefully by the end of it I'll be a master of this particular form of music.

It's a lot of fun to do. Music is not one of my strengths, I can hold a tune more or less. This is different though. This is a return to writing comedy songs, which I've actually been doing since I was knee high to a grasshopper. The first song I remember writing was a song I wrote with my brother by the fictitious Ballymahochies. The song was called "Another ten names" and was an Irish lament about how Irish rebel heroes seem to qualify by nothing more than the virtue of dying.

Sadly the tape it was recorded on has long been destroyed, but apparently the urge to write has returned. When I think about it, all I'm doing these days is the stuff I was doing as a kid, which was arsing about. The only difference is that I used to make a fool of myself, if this project happens I'll have returned fully to the folly of my youth. God help me.

A little breather

2011-01-19T22:31:00.002Z

No, not a small phone pest. I'm taking a short break from writers fag break as I'm suffering a bit from brain Fatigue. I'm on a deadline and expect I'll be up late tonight working on finishing my script changes.

I'm doing rewrites on a first draft and typically last night just before I was dropping off I realised a way of making the script significantly better, unfortunately there isn't the time to do it.

Instead I'm improving the script as it stands at the moment without dramatically altering the structure of it.

I'm always surprised how organic ideas can be, things that you're convinced are great and work really well get cut and then you forget that they were ever in there.

I remember reading back Fridge of Time drafts and wincing at some of the earlier drafts. I guess this will be no different.

Right, that was a pretty useless ramble....back to it.

All roads lead to Bexhill on sea.

2011-01-18T22:08:00.003Z

I'm not superstitious by nature. Sure I've scrawled pentagrams and burned incense so people that have slighted me get horribly maimed and I might have sacrificed a virgin or two for as eat on the Northern line on occasion, but then who hasn't?

Generally though I don't hold any store in coincidences. I'm a believer of science and reason even when life can seem strangely, even romantically coincidental sometimes.

Which brings me to the fact I'm moving, that is "we're moving" and one of the locations that has presented itself is, Bexhill on sea.

For those of you who don't know Spike Milligan was stationed there during the war from 1940 to 1942.

Since I've taken more than a passing interest in Comedy it's become clear that Spike is a comedy goliath. Out of all the books I've read Spike's war diaries connected with me in a way the others didn't. I'm not sure why, maybe it's because I have a Bi polar Mother and Grandfather and I know that Spike suffered from it as well. It might just be that he's funny and was a bit of a smart arse, which is a label that's been levelled at me more than once.

Bexhill is also the place that Eddie Izzard spent some of his formative years. I'm also led to believe that Graham Norton lives there. I began to wonder if he's there because of some romantic and misplaced notion that by moving to Bexhill he would somehow absorb some of the aura of the late, great Milligan.

You see where this going don't you. I am of course a completely different bag of antelopes to Izzard and Milligan. Still it might be nice to live there knowing that two of the comedy greats spent time in Bexhill.

It's still very much open as to whether we move, but possibly like Graham an opportunity arose and the link was enough to make the place seem worth a look.

You have to take your inspiration where you can get it.

Revisiting an old post.

2011-01-17T21:37:00.003Z

Time flew today and the day slipped away before it felt like it had begun. I'd even got up earlier than usual.

I'm polishing off a treatment for my meeting tomorrow. It always seems there is more editing to do with writing. You can never quite be sure you've finished, a bit like your bladder in old age.

I'm completely in a daze today as if I'm a mere spectator in the things I'm doing. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm going slightly senile. I also have a recurring pain in my left ear. Perhaps a small rodent has crawled into my ear and has set up home.

One other tiny bit of progress is that I've managed to improve the lyrics of my song, but not really enough to get excited about it.

My song is dragging on unbelievably, I keep finding better lyrics for it. This is in itself great and I know that eventually I will have a kick ass song. The only problem is that I may never be finished.

Come fly with me

2011-01-16T10:05:00.002Z

There's a pattern emerging here. I write about a comedy film or show I've seen and I complain about not liking it.

I'm not going to disappoint here, unless you enjoy reading a well thought out and insightful comments. In which case you've wildly misinterpreted what my blog has to offer.

First I have to start by saying that I like, "little Britain" both Matt Lucas and David Walliams

in my eyes have been a one of the highlights in British comedy in recent years. I do think that some of their work has been patchy, Little Britain USA was flogging a dead horse and the series should have been put to bed a while ago.

I thought"Come fly with me", was poor, I did laugh a couple of times but overall it felt as thought they weren't really trying anymore. It feels like they've had their day, the jokes were easy and obvious, not always a bad thing.

I didn't feel any of the characters had anything new to offer. The sleazy Boss of Flyo, constantly trying to make cuts and ways of improving his companies PR was so close to the reality it might have been a documentary.

The immigrations officer was really obvious, he's a racist and doesn't want to let anyone in and so it went on

It wasn't totally bereft of laughs, there were some bright moments, sadly they don't spring to mind.

I did really like the credits at the end though.

The Return of Zeus

2011-01-14T19:54:00.003Z

I just watched "Fame Addict" back and I still think that Zeus is a character worth returning to.
I don't think we really got it right, but there is something about Zeus that I think should be revisited. With a little bit of development I think he might actually work.

Friday.

2011-01-14T17:04:00.003Z

Today I've been polishing up a pitch for a meeting I have next week. The show in question is an animated show and one that I think has legs.

There's a great sense of accomplishment when you finish something even if it is just a treatment.

I'd like to think this show might actually go somewhere, it's a solid concept and I hope it ticks all of the boxes.

I'm crossing my fingers it gets a positive reaction.

I've had to put down my short for a little while, I've run out of inspiration. I have to force myself to work through it.

That's what I'm going to do now....

Jokes

2011-01-14T00:16:00.003Z

I've been mulling over the work I did for Objective earlier in the week. It was interesting because during the day I had to come up with some funny ideas with very little direction.

That's not really unusual in itself. As I wasn't asked to write in any particular style, I just came up with some random ideas. I've noticed there were certain themes in my work. I guess it could be style.

I noticed some repetition in some of the ideas I came up with. It got me thinking that I obviously have certain subjects hardwired into my comedy brain.

For instance I was raised a catholic and religious themes appear quite a lot in my comedy.

Since leaving school I've become an atheist, but its surprised that religion plays such a recurring theme.

I remember reading an excerpt from Steve Martin's book where Steve Martin was told by David Letterman "You'll use everything you know" and I'm curious to know where those connections are made and how early your comedy sensibility is formed.

I've noticed that a lot of comedy these days seems to be celebrity orientated. I suppose because it holds a mirror up to our culture. I'm not sure I particularly warm to that sort of thing.

Right now I don't have a style but it's beginning to appear the more I write. I know that I want to become as funny as I can. I'm not sure how you go about it other than writing as often as you can.

I've tried writing politically engaged comedy and that's not for me either. I like silliness pure and simple. I'm not sure how much of a market there is for it.

Episodes.

2011-01-11T21:59:00.003Z

I watched the first Episode of the new BBC sitcom "Episodes" yesterday. I was intrigued and I must admit that after reading a few articles online I was looking forward to it.

It was written by David Crane and Jeffrey Klarik. David is well known for being one of the creators of Friends. His partner Jeffrey Klarik was a writer on "Dream On", a show I have a particular fondness for.

I was really disappointed and worse completely bored. So much so that I actually had to stop myself from turning it off and shooting myself in the face.

At the ten minute point absolutely nothing had happened. I persevered because I really wanted to like this show. I thought the premise was interesting enough to have some mileage and I enjoy good comedy.

It was so ponderous and dull that I thought I might cry. It felt like it had been written by two doddering old men that are past it and now like to drive nice and slow. The joke count seemed to be on every third or fourth page rather than one and they laboured, boy did they labour.

It wasn't helped either by the direction, which once again seemed to be lacking any imagination at all. It might as well have been an episode of Coronation Street.

It also seemed to me that all of the british performances, bar Daisy Haggard whose role was simply pulling some faces and make odd noises in an american accent were so wooden and unfunny that it was actually embarrassing.

I like Matt LeBlanc, he has great comic timing, only he wasn't actually in the show as far as I can tell.

He's been touted as the big star but had all of two minutes of screen time.

Which to me is odd as the only joke in the show seems to be Matt being completely wrong for the role.

This does actually seem to be the only joke in the programme. Matt Le Blanc is wrong for the part. The writers think so, Matt thinks so, the studio execs think so, they get Matt Le Blanc. This seems to be the basis of the entire series. Only Matt's not in it.

I wondered whether the the paucity of Matt had anything to do with him being on a pay as you play deal. For every extra second that Matt is on screen it will cost an extra 100 thousand dollars.

I can just hear the producer getting off the phone with Matt's agent and saying proudly "Ok we can afford Matt for two minutes per episode. Can you guys fill the other 28 minutes of the show up with you know, other stuff?"

"Sure, sure don't worry we'll fill, we'll fill it like a fucking graveyard after a massacre."

It certainly seemed like it because his role at least in the first episode was reduced to snippets and flashbacks.

generally I don't like criticising sit coms, I know it's hard to produce and I know the work involved. I would much rather say nothing than just slag something off. After all just because I I don't like something doesn't mean that there isn't a market for it or it's not funny.

But I just didn't like this show no matter how much I wanted to.

The show's ratings were good. I'm interested to see if the figures stay the same next week.

I am going to watch another Episode though and see if it improves but based on the first show though I doubt it.

What I did today.

2011-01-11T19:28:00.006Z

Today I spent a day at Objective productions doing a day of development for a pilot intended for Dave.

It was a strange day. I was led to a small padded room covered with excrement and blood stains and asked to come up with ideas for the show format or suffer the consequences.

As I was led into the room, a poor malnourished husk of what I can only surmise to be the previous incumbent was dragged out screaming in a straight jacket.

Then I was left to my own devices in the basement to write comedy magic. Periodically I could hear the howls of someone in another room clearly, suffering the consequences. No pressure then.

Alright none of this actually happened, I had a fun day. I did feel a little like I was having a day long job interview.

I'm not sure how I got on really. I don't even know if the pilot will happen. I did what I thought I was asked to do and I suppose that pragmatically if I was shit there's not a lot I can really do about it. I did do my best, that is I tried to be creative and I was hopefully funny.

I'm waiting to hear what the verdict will be if it's bad I can at least blame it on having a different comedy sensibility.

It's still a great feeling to be doing it. I wonder which poor sod they'll get in tomorrow.

A mini Milestone

2011-01-09T21:48:00.002Z

Today, I more or less finished a project I've been chipping away at for a while. It's a song and one that I hope I will be able to make a video to accompany it.

A few people have heard it and the response so far has been really positive. It's one of those projects I really want to do.

But I don't want to go down the route of making a video again for no money. If I can't maintain the kind of visual quality I had with "The Goss", then I don't want to do it.

I can't afford to keep funding my own films, particularly not now. I've done no budget filmmaking and it's really not worth doing.

Except that I really want to make it happen, because it's just one of those things that is bugging me.

I'm so glad that I made "The Goss", it was annoying that it didn't get picked up in the end. But the joy of making it outweighed it the negatives for me.

Even if Filmmaking was an expensive hobby with no reward I would still do it. It's too much fun not to.

I have so much to do in the next few months. I'm not sure if I'll be able to find a way to make it happen.

Here's hoping.

I lack discipline

2011-01-09T10:11:00.003Z

There I said it. The truth is out and now I can't put the genie back in the bottle. Since I started writing full time I've found it a little difficult to organize myself. This is because I have no routine and I'm well disorganised.

This morning I read an article from a writing eblast(I didn't sign up for it, it just magically appeared in my inbox) that was extolling the virtue of simply writing everyday.

Which for the most I do. The problem is that it's more often than not my writing interspersed with hours of faffing in between.

I don't think that this is an unfamiliar problem for writers, writing essentially means that only your brain is moving, this is not a normal state of affairs for a Homo Sapien.

I'm going to need to find some coping strategies, this will undoubtedly become another way of not doing any work as I create productivity charts and endless schedules to organise my day.

The first thing I'm going to do is get off the flippin internet. It's a nightmare, the internet is the single most powerful distraction tool ever created.

I'm surprised that the entire world hasn't ground to a shuddering square eyed halt. If the internet had been around in world war one there's a good chance it wouldn't have happened.

The German high command would have spent hours on Google Earth looking for the best place to have their troops invade France.

They would have been bombarded with adverts for holidays. Then as they try to find out more about the area, the unrelenting ads and picturesque photos of the French countryside becomes to much to bear and they book themselves into a chateaux for a fortnight self catering.

The internet is evil, I'm on it now, justifying this blog entry as some warm up writing for the day. But what I'm actually doing is wasting time, precious time.

I'm like a hollow eyed crack addict, I know I need to quit and that slowly it's killing me shortening my attention span and filling my head full of useless trivia.

A small rational voice in my brain knows quitting is a great idea. I'd be free then, I'd have all the time in the world.

But like a thoroughly lost true addict, I convince myself there are so many reason's not to quit.

How will I find out what's happening in the news? I'll miss repeats of Hancock's Half Hour. I wouldn't be able to advertise to the world that I'm updating my Facebook status.

There's no way I can do it, I'm hooked, plugged in. I'm not even sure I could quit if I wanted to.

So how then do I actually get any work done. There's probably a blog about it somewhere. I'll have a look.

Decision time.

2011-01-06T16:15:00.003Z

While I'm waiting for feedback on my script. I'm back on my short film project. I say short, but it looks likely to end up being a pilot for a series.

Whether the character has the legs to carry a series I'm yet to be convinced.

As usual I've been wrestling with it and it feels like it's at a point where I have to start taking some bold decisions. It started out as a sketch, then developed into a stand alone short. It's now evolved from there and I'm not sure how comfortably the new direction is has taken sits with the original concept.

The great thing is that the main character seems to shine through. At least he does in my opinion.

The hard part now is getting it to work together because I feel like it's actually two films at the moment. The thing that is holding them together seems a bit tenuous.

Because there's a behind the scenes element to it I'm worried that it might work as well as I would like.

I need to break it's back as soon as I can and get on to other stuff. I'll just keep staring at it until it starts making sense.

That last little bit....

2011-01-03T12:49:00.002Z

I'm taking a little thought breather from the script I've been commissioned to write.

I'm just about there with it, but I am at a point where I'm crawling over the finish line.

Sometimes tying up the loose ends is the most difficult talk. I'm planning on being finished by the end of the day. I hope I do otherwise I have to ask some serious questions about my organisational skills.

In the meantime I watched the pilot of Chuck which is an NBC show the other night and I thought I would mention it.

First, here's what in my humble opinion is what I thought was wrong with it.

The basic premise is that an uber nerd called Chuck receives an email from an old college friend who unbeknowst to him just so happens to be a secret agent working for the US government. Before his untimely death he sends every secret the US has on file via email to Chuck.

Chuck opens the mail and inadvertently downloads into his brain. The original computer is fried and the only repository for the information is the now very important Chuck.

It's a flimsy, but a fun premise. Though there are so many holes in it that you could use it the play connect four with it.

The story unfolds and it's soon apparent that the information in Chuck's head is so valuable that he is assigned two agents to protect him 24/7. A beautiful CIA spy and a hard nosed gung-ho NSA agent.

I can only assume as the series continues Chuck will become a nerdy James Bond and will no doubt be wearing tuxedo's, doing marshall arts and firing guns at various turban wearing bad guys before we know it.

I had issues with the casting, Chuck is a hollywood nerd and by that I mean he really is just a pretty boy playing a nerd.

Which is a shame, because I think you could have a lot of fun with the character. If he's a nrd make him a nerd. As usual the urge to have the cast look like a catwalk is just too strong to resist.

The show is billed as a comedy, at least I think it is. It doesn't seem to quite know what it is.

It's not an action show, because the action is not executed well enough to make it credible.

Also I didn't really find it funny at all. I felt the script needed a big old rewrite, add some jokes and lose some of the flab..

I couldn't really decide if the show was low budget show or not. There seemed some moments of nice looking stunts and action, but in placing it was pretty cringe worthy

The reason I'm not sure, is that the poor shot choices and slow cutting may have been down to budget. The show is ambitious and probably the director may have had to work around a lot of restrictions or it may simply have just poor directing.

The jokes such as they were seemed lost in weird shot choices, it was a strange mix and individually all of the problems I had with it should have made it a car crash.

But here's the really weird thing, despite all of that I enjoyed it. It had energy and charm and it was fun to watch.

Somehow something about the show just worked. It's nowhere near as coherent or consistent as some of my other favourite shows, but I liked it.

I may buy the boxset at some point.

The last day of the year.

2010-12-31T11:04:00.003Z

I've managed to put my back out, which not only hurts tremendously but also serves it right.

It's supported me over the years but there comes a time when you have to let go and try and stand on your on two feet.

I had no idea how difficult this would be without a spinal cord but I'm not going to roll over(I couldn't if I wanted to).

My vertebrae can wait outside until it's learned just who the boss really is. I know it will come crawling back with it's vestigial tail between its legs.

Until it does I shall have to sit stiffly in pain, which may mean that I'm biting my nose to spite my face. But there you have it.

As it's the last day of the year I should probably do one of those retrospectives review the years highs and lows.

I think on reflection 2010 is best summed up with the word "meh".

Back in business

2010-12-29T22:23:00.004Z

I'm back at work, that is writing after recovering from the holidays. I was hoping to actually get some work done while I was away, but really I was kidding myself if I thought I was going to get anything done what with the flu, then Christmas and the Kennedy Space Centre.

I had a lot on my plate.

Coming back to the UK after ten days in the US is quite sobering, too sobering. In fact it's probably a great excuse to start drinking again.

So now I'm back and am finally cracking on with the episode of the series I'm working on. As I signed a NDA I am unable to say a word, but that's ok. I'm having fun. I just wish I was going a bit faster.

I'm finding the life of a writer a bit more sedentary than I'm used to. It's just too easy to plonk myself on the couch write for a bit, then doze off like a pensioner in a care home. As I'm still

in my thirties I don't think catapulting my lifestyle into my early 70's is a something I want to be doing.

I know that a lot of writers have coping strategies to break the tedium, they go to various cafe's and work all day.

My problem is the constant guilt of sitting in a cafe and not ordering at least five items an hour is too much to bear.

I soon start to feel uncomfortable, I feel I'm taking up someone's space and using the cafe's electricity.

I have too much guilt and social conscience, it ends up costing me a fortune in coffee and muffins. By the end of the day there's so much caffeine in my bloodstream paranoia kicks in and I convince myself the manager and staff are planning on forcibly ejecting me.

So this probably isn't the best solution for me. As a precaution I have ordered an adult diaper, which should mean that if I can't get off the couch at least I won't have to get off the couch.

The Flu

2010-12-23T18:21:00.002Z

Once again my blog has gone transatlantic. I'm in Florida for the holidays and finally for the first time in over a week I don't feel like death.
I've had the flu and I don't mean man flu, the real actual flu. At my most sick I had to fly for 13 hours on a plane coughing up my lungs much to the annoyance of the other passengers.
Anyway I'm out of the worst of it and today I'm back to work to try and catch up. Before I do though I want to talk about Seinfeld.
I'm not exactly sure when I saw my first episode, I have a feeling it was in the UK. It was hard to find it continually got bumped around the schedule and was on late at night. I think I liked it immediately. But it wasn't until I moved to Vancouver that I actually got to watch it.
I would rush home after work and try and sneak in an episode, then watch cheers.
Seinfeld is so easy to watch that it's hard to appreciate how good it is. I bought a book of scripts for the first and second seasons and seeing it written down really throws new light on how good it actually is.
I can't imagine being able to write anything that good and well observed. The cast obviously help enormously but it's so strong on paper and even though it's not my sensibility it's very inspiring.

The Morgana Show

2010-12-16T09:49:00.004Z

Before I get my day started I want to have a moan about "The Morgana show". Which I watched for the first and coincidentally last time last night.

Ok generally I try not to slate other peoples work, because comedy is subjective and just because I "don't get it" doesn't mean it isn't any good. This was just bad.

I have a lot of respect for channel 4, over the years they've produced a lot of really decent comedy. As I don't actually have a TV anymore I have missed a huge amount of stuff that's on so I can't comment too much about what's on at the moment.

I'm suffering from the flu so spent the evening wrapped in a blanket so I gave it a go. It was terrible and I was quite shocked. I generally expect a lot more from the channel.

I'd never heard of Morgana Robinson before last night but I can't help think that I see funnier and more worthy acts in dingy pubs across London on a weekly basis.

It's obvious she can act, but that's not a reason to give her six half hour comedy shows.

It just wasn't funny at all. I wonder how the show came about, it seems really strange to me that something that bereft of the slightest bit of humour could slip under the radar. I've seen huge billboard adverts for it so someone must believe in it.

With so much great comedy out there I just can't understand the decision. There are more talented, funny people out there that deserve a break. Sorry.

The other guys.

2010-12-15T22:18:00.003Z

I watched the other guys today and I have to say surprisingly I enjoyed it. I liked the look of the trailer and although I'm generally not a big fan of Will Ferrel it was for the most part good fun I'm not suggesting Will Ferrel's not funny. It's just that I've never really been convinced of him as a leading man.

I've always enjoyed his smaller roles for some reason. I loved him in Jay and Silent Bob strikes back and in Austin Powers even though his role was tiny. He seems better in concentrated doses for me.

Overall I liked the film, there were some great ideas in it. As usual it got lost along in the final third but I thought it was entertaining.

One thing that helped was the direction it had some production value and there was thought put into it.

The schmultz was there but it seemed it was kept to a minimum, in fact I got the impression it was added in as an afterthought.

Definitely worth a couple of hours of my time.

Nothing in particular

2010-12-13T22:30:00.002Z

I've had a rather tumultuous weekend, it's only Monday, I'm feeling very tired and strangely itchy.

I also have lumps, yes lumps. My lymph nodes are up and about and making themselves known to me.

As a fully fledged closet hypochondriac the only diagnosis I can give myself is Hodgkins Lymphoma. Now you may raise an eyebrow at my diagnosis based on what appears to be scant evidence. Granted the itchy might have something to do with changing washing powders to a brand written in a language that may or may be Uzbek that I paid a pound for in the local thrift store.

The lumps could be my body fighting an infection that saw my girlfriend rushed into hospital and admitted and pumped full of drugs. It could be that. However the neurotic in me has decided otherwise and lets face it, just because you're a hypochondriac doesn't mean you won't get cancer.

Today I was finally meant to start my new script, however after an emotionally fraught weekend my mind was a blank so instead I've been researching which is a term used commonly to mean, not doing very much.

So tomorrow I begin in earnest. Hopefully my brain will be functioning better than it has today until then I'm going to continue my research.

Finding good habits

2010-12-08T22:54:00.002Z

I am by my very nature a cynic. I've been looking for some specific information on writing and thanks to the internet there is a wealth of information available on the internet.

I soon got lost in the deluge of information. There are so many sources that advertise paradigms and techniques for writing it hard not to get lost in it. To me it seems that in most cases if anything it stifles creativity.

I can't help but feel that if you're reading a "how to book", then you can't do it. I'm not saying for a second that it's a waste of time, it would be ignorant to suggest you can't learn a thing from them.

The various rules and jargon that is espoused by various people I'm sure is useful.

Years ago I read Syd fields book and I found it helpful, more or less. I'm not sure I particularly paid attention to it.

Because it does all sound limiting to me, scripts need structure sure, but it's not what you hang the curtains on that makes the curtains interesting is it?

I'm currently working on a system for writing, I don't have one and I thought it might be useful to get into some good habits.

I've never been one for treatments, stupid I know. I start with dialogue and always have. My stories tend to appear a bit like random blots of ink on a paper I keep working on it until it fills the entire page.

Order and Structure are really important and one of my personality is a lack of planning.

Throughout my life I'm totally convinced that if I'd have only planned things a bit more I would have achieved much better results. I don't think it really works that way with writing.

It's going to be hard to make this work though, I am by nature a cougher upper of ideas. While I've got the opportunity I would like to get into some good habits.

Drip, drip, drip.

2010-12-06T23:28:00.002Z

Today while I was waiting to get the new project underway I revisited my film. The break has been really useful because it's given me a bit of distance.
I did a little bit of research on the subject and I think I may have inadvertently found the thread that will help tie the entire project together.
It does mean though that I have to almost completely rewrite the script. Despite this I'm really excited about the direction it's taking.
Fridge, became a very personal project and it is very English in it's execution. This new film could be set anywhere in any culture and I really think that's a strength. A slightly frustrating part is that when I began I essentially wrote a bunch of funny scenes, now I'm going to have to completely rewrite large sections of it. Actually I think some of the funniest stuff I think I've written and it will have to go but I can't afford to be precious.
I'm going to have to cut out a lot of the funniest stuff because it no longer serves the plot. Unlike The Fridge Of Time I don't have a deadline for this project. This time last year I was frantically trying to finish the project to present to Jane Berthoud at the BBC.
I don't know how realistic it's going to be to get it finished before the end of year. If it's anything like Fridge then I will keep on writing and rewriting until the last minute.

Sitcoms.

2010-12-06T10:16:00.003Z

I've ordered some new comedy, entirely based on an anonymous bloggers opinion. It's only just occurred to me that I may have been marketed to without even realising.

I was looking at American sitcoms and I've ordered the first season of Eastbound And Down. One show that I'm keen to see is Parks and Recreation.

I had a look at five shows and what struck me was how much broader the situations are than the comedy we produce here in the UK.

I'm really drawn to comedy in the US, there's a lot of it. Admittedly lots of it is crap, but there seems to be so much of it that is good.

From the outside America seem much more willing to take risks. We seem to lack imagination when it comes to the premise of the show themselves.

I don't profess to be much of an expert but we do seem to write a lot of comedy about families. There is also currently a glut of show's based around stand up comedians. In the US shows are generally bigger than their stars, not the other way around.

I think it has a lot to do with budget, or lack of it. There is also a lot of fear and very few opportunities for new writers to break into TV.

I do wonder if it would be easier to work in the states.

Date night.

2010-12-05T23:03:00.002Z

I've just watched Date Night, starring Steve Carell and Tina Fey. I'm still not sure what kind of movie it was meant to be.

The opening was by far the dullest 20 minutes of a film I've seen for a long time and this is a shame because I think Tina Fey and Steve Carell are both great. I really do think that Tina Fey

is one of the best female comedy actors I've ever seen.

The opening 20 minutes felt like a documentary except without any of the interest normally associated with real life, the pacing was so slow that it felt like I was almost watching a night out in real time.

I suppose from a directorial stand point the intention was to make the characters seem humdrum and ordinary.

If that was indeed the intention then it worked a little too well because I almost turned it off.

When the plot finally got going, at what felt around the 23 minute point I thought, ok this might go somewhere.

Then the leads began wisecracking while having a gun pointed in their faces. Call me naive, but I didn't buy it.

The pacing was all over the place, there were long periods of Marital dialogue, it was as if the

entire film had been forgotten to shoe horn in the Hollywood schmultz of "lets save our relationship".

There were some funny moments, though it felt as if the movie didn't really know what it wanted to be.

It put me in mind of Blind Date and I suspect there was an intention to recreate the film for a modern audience.

I remember Blind Date being a let down, this wasn't even in the ballpark.

Duel-Men with big swords

2010-12-04T21:52:00.000Z

Duel-Men With Big Swords - watch more funny videos

Writing

2010-12-03T10:21:00.002Z

Once the euphoria of getting a full time writing gig has worn off. It soon dawns on you that now you have to be funny for a living and on demand, rather than offering an amusing anecdote occasionally and writing clever line here and there.

The difference between a hobbyist and someone that works full time is that you are under the kosh and have to produce the goods.

So now it's all about structuring things so I can find a routine that works for me. I'll have to test my reservoir of funny.

Lets hope I've only scratched the surface and I will continue to improve.

Johnny English

2010-12-02T23:31:00.002Z

GOOD LORD. I'm watching Johnny English and I've stopped mid film because I feel compelled to write.

I like Rowan Atkinson as a comedy performer. Ok, I like Blackadder, for some reason I was never one for Mr Bean. I think the reason for me is Rowan Atkinsn played the cynical Edmund Blackadder so well that seeing him as an incompetent just feels wrong.

I remember the Barclaycard adverts very well, particularly the one in the Dinghy where Rowan bounces the Binoculars and they disappear into the lake. At the time Rowan was at the height of his career and he was just really playing edmund as a spy, pompous and over confident. For some reason I've never been able to warm to him playing weaker, bumbling characters.

Johnny English did well at the box office, I'm not sure why. it's not funny, there are some laughs in it, but some of the joke setups are so clumsy that I find myself rolling my eyes.

Dear oh dear and now there's going to be a sequel....

Nepotism isn't all that bad when it's in your favour.

2010-12-02T15:36:00.004Z

It's now official official Suzanne Milligan at PBJ is my agent. I'm quite pleased with this turn of events. It's going to save me the hassle of negotiating my own rates and I will have someone fighting my corner.

I'm also going to be writing on a Nickelodeon series which I'm ecstatic about for a number of reasons.

I feel like it's been a long time coming and what is telling about it is that the job came about through a friend of mine who I had written a script for a few years back.

The problem I've face with my writing is that I never have time to do it for myself so getting my material together has taken a long time.

I was paid for the script and so had a reason to do it. As luck would have it, it was very similar in style to the show I'm going to be writing on.

So there you have it, it's not what you know it's who you know. Granted I had to write a script in the first place, but it does prove my theory that most opportunities arise through nepotism.

I did get the job on my own merit, I had to prove I knew what I was doing.

I know there are forms of nepotism that have nothing whatsoever to do with an ability to do a said task.

The more people you know the better chance you have of making those connections work for you. It sounds mercenary but I'm beginning to see the importance of it.

So from now on I'm going to be doing more writing as part of my living, I'm well chuffed.

Brrr

2010-11-29T16:19:00.003Z

My feet are cold, actually all of me is cold. Because its cold in here and nothing I do will make me any warmer.

Every now and then, like today, I get disheartened. I feel like there is far too much talking going on in the world.

I've finally finished the "Fridge Of Time" for TV, only to find out that the BBC have something similar in development even before I sent it in. I've sent it off to my agent regardless.

I'm not sure if it means that the Fridge will never see the light of day. It's plausible that it wouldn't even if there was nothing similar at the Beeb.

I still want to hear it at the very least. One day when I get the chance I'm going to record the voices just for myself. So it lives, I didn't write it to be hidden in a drawer.

I still haven't heard from the writing job and as the days go by I'm resigning myself to not getting it.

It's a bit of a blow. Standing still in this industry is hard enough. I know other opportunities will arise but it's now I have to take care of and I'm aware I have a deadline fast approaching.

I'll just keep on, it's hard though sometimes especially when you can't feel your toes.

The Comedy Vaults....

2010-11-28T23:50:00.003Z

Finally I uploaded my clips warts and all onto the net and it's odd looking back on them now.

I've realised that my sense of humour has evolved considerably since I made them.

Aside from all the technical problems they all seem very subdued and dry. It's more apparent when my films stand side by side. I'm sure some of it can be attributed to the restrictions that were placed on me.

More often than not all I had to work with was two actors, a camera and whatever props we could find in the studio.

The clips I uploaded today do seem to take themselves a bit too seriously, probably because I was being very serious about it all.

There seems to be a lack in the UK of absurdity in comedy these days. Miranda sort of falls into that category and I like it for that reason.

Much as I like the office, and Peep show I sometimes get the impression that the humour is so cynical and uncomfortable that sometimes it's hard to find the punchline.

I'm drawn more and more to silliness, as shock humour can only really go so far. I remember when I started writing comedy sketches and I began looking to ramp up the humour a lot of stuff I wrote had shock value and were crass.

I've steered myself away from that now. I much prefer to try and find the joke without the need for profanity or talking about bodily functions.

That's not to say that I'm cured, but I am aware of it and I think I'm trying to work my brain to write different types of jokes.

I wouldn't dream of writing the kind of sketches I made a few years ago. I don't think they're awful, they were essays in a way. A way of learning the ropes. It's a real pity that I haven't been able to do more since.

The nice thing is that I can see the improvement and that's heartening. I hope that I will get the opportunity to keep on making clips. I don't want to stop now, I feel like I might actually be getting somewhere.

Grrr

2010-11-28T17:33:00.002Z

I've had a very frustrating day today trying to upload my comedy clips onto the internet. As usual there's always a problem.
Whether it's the wrong codec or a browser not playing the clips it always seems beset with obstacles.
I have a lot of material, some of it unfinished, that the world has never seen.
Sometimes it's hard to have all of this work and not being able to do anything with it.
My first film In The Running was made for peanuts and the sad fact is that barely anyone has seen it.
The Fame Addict sketch really was the first time I'd spent money on a sketch, granted it was a tiny amount but it shows and I think it looks great.
Looking back on my old work I'm mildly horrified at how poor it is, but then you'd expect that from no budget film making.
In fact the reason I gave up making clips was because I realised that it wasn't worth spending time and what little money I had, sometimes literally tens of pounds producing clips that no one would ever see.
There were always problems, mostly with sound. Sound people will not work for free and I always had to rely on whoever was around, inevitably this led to some disasters and it's too late once it's in the can.
I got so frustrated with it in the end, the last straw was a sketch I spent over a hundred pounds on which in the end I never filmed.
I couldn't afford a smoke machine and decided that rather than do it without I would just not make it.
It took me almost over a year to get started again. Even now budget is a problem and there is no such thing as no budget film making no matter how many books or courses are written about the subject.
I'm much more experienced now and I know how to make things look great on a little as possible.
But once again I've run out of road, I simply can't afford to personally pay for comedy sketches.
I'm planning my next sketch. I know exactly what I want to do. I may though have to wait for a windfall before I can start splurging on personal films.

2010-11-27T09:35:00.004Z

Harrumph and Botheration. I'm in a mood, it's probably lack of food . I am known to get rather snippy, if I don't eat enough. Luckily my bark, more of a squeak, is definitely worse than my bite.

I had a meeting with the BBC last Thursday about the Half Hour, Half Hour. It was the most informal one yet, which was quite nice.

I had a very nice chat with a producer in development and he seemed like a thoroughly nice chap.

Sadly though if my career is a unstoppable juggernaught, I'm still waiting to find the keys.

On the upside, it does seem that I am finally being recognised as someone who can write comedy. The drawback is that much like a nature documentary on dangerous animals the response from people in a position to commission seem to be one of simple classification and then observation from a safe distance.

I suppose to see if said writer/dangerous animal does anything interesting or unpredictable.

The next phase I presume will be to move safe slowly move towards the writer when they know it's safe.

I daresay a particularly brave commissioner may even through me a crumb or two.

And it really bothers me, the only thing stopping me going out every weekend and filming is the simple fact that the last time I checked comedy sketches weren't on the list of life sustaining essentials.

The upshot of the meeting is that I may eventually end up producing some sketches for BBC comedy online.

The ball is as usual firmly in my court. I'm charged with the task of coming up with topical, hilarious, send-on-able clips. It's not an easy task.

I'm really not sure if the internet has helped or hindered people's chances of getting anywhere. In some ways it's opened the door to allowing people to advertise their work. I disagree with the idea of a levelled playing field. It may have democratised the process and offers more opportunity, but it has in some ways complicated and made thing more difficult.

There is an awful lot of store held by commissioners in clips going viral and they are desperate for those kind of pieces. I do question how often the success of a clip repeated.

I don't believe there is a formula for a successful viral.

What gets passed on is often so arbitrary and dependant on so many factors. I feel as though it's chasing an elusive magical formula for the sake of views, which as yet haven't been turned into a marketable product.

There's an obsession of jumping on the bandwagon at it's worst it feels like desperation, the plaintive "notice me" of a lonely insecure attention seeking teenager.

At it's best it's a throwaway, disposable happy meal made for instant gratification. It leaves you feeling sick and empty and you've forgotten seconds after the last bite.

As a writer all I can do is continue coming up with ideas and hope that one or two stick. I know the rules, I've been to the meetings and understand what "everyone" is looking for, but it's not an easy thing to create.

The planets have to align and in my experience they rarely do.Doesn't mean you can't try though.